A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

a show horse jumps over a bar

Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

Yeah, totally.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

Women's rights.

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

What was the pirate's favorite letter? Q.

What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

What's the difference between and onion and a dead baby? There is a big difference.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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