A man is walking down the street when a woman asks "excuse me, have you got the time?" to which the man replies "Yes..yes i do" the woman thanks him, and continues with her time constricted shannigans.

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Knock knock *No one was home*

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

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how do you get a emo kid out of a tree? cut him down get it: because he was depressed and so poor that he couldn't afford a hair cut or new clothes. he also had single mother whose boyfriend sexually abused him so he was confused about his sexuality. Then people just called him "emo" and said he was acting out so they ignored him and he never gave him help when he asked for it because they said he just wanted attention so he killed himself

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have herpes. If I were you I would get tested.

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Why did Harry go to the store? He was out of food.

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Knock knock. Come in.

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penis

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What happens when you put a bunch of Republicans in a room together? They form a caucus.

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This is not a good joke.

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What do Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, Slavs, Gays, and Retards have in common? The Holocaust.

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Why did the black man swim across the lake? He didnt. He drowned

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Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:Why does everyone want to know it's just a chicken

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roses are black, violets are black, im sleeping

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What do you do when you're making out with your girlfriend? Play with another dude's ass.

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What do you call a special Ed walrus? Anorexic pony ???? Discovering that a convicted sex offenderi is living nearby stirs up a range of feelings: fear, anger, insecurity and anxiety. There are many things you can do to make the situation more manageable - and channel these emotions into actions that address situations that put children most at risk for sexual harm. Learn how to identify the most common threats and concerns. Then find out the best ways you can join with others to keep everyone safe. Take action! Learn how to keep children safe Get the FAQs about the sex offender registryi Download our Tip Sheet:  Concerned about Sex Offenders in Your Neighborhood?

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How much is an abortion? A life

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Will you marry me?

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Holocaust jokes aren't funny and frankly, I do not see why people think they are so funny.

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What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

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I like the Tsarnaev brothers. They ran the Boston marathon and had a BLAST!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops