Your not having a bad day, your just doing everything wrong!

What do you call a black man that is working on a farm? A farmer.

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

Paul Dylan King!

Womens' rights.

What's better than Westboro Church? Committing over 9000 sins.

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

potatoes

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? Jamal

Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

women's lacrosse.

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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