a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

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A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

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What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

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What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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A man walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a glass of milk. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve milk here.

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Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

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Why did the boy have a tumor? Because he had cancer.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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What do you call a kid with a peg leg and an eye patch? Names

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roses are red, violets are violet

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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