What did one German man say to the other? Wo ist das Badezimmer?

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What's the funniest thing about the holocaust? Nothing it wasn't a joke

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George Bush, a little boy, and his grandfather are on an airplane with a failing engine. They have only two parachutes to save themselves. The plane crashes and they all die.

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What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

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2 Jews walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks and call a cab to get home

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What did the man do when he saw the dog? Ran it over

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

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What did the Chinaman say to the other Chinaman? I dont know, he was speaking in Chinese.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ghuieruioytidhfdvbshdkhfjh

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You know what you can do with your offer to 'help'? Await another opportunity please I appreciate it much.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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*Knock Knock* "whose there?"... "me"

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? Mittens

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Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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When life gives you Lebanon, make lebanonanade.

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why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

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Rozes r read Vilets r blew iy cahn noht spell becuase i am blind.

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Yo mamma is so fat, when Dracula bit her, he got type 2 diabetes.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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Knock knock Who's there? Rick Rick who? Your wife's boss. I regret to inform you that your wife has sustained a injury on the job and she is in intensive care... I also regret to inform you that your insurance doesn't cover the injury

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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