I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

A man walked into a bar and said, oppa gangnam style That man is now dead

I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

Why was the black man shot, He resisted against a highly political challenger. Unfortunately for him the Armenian politician was not a very nice guy.

What is funnier than dead babies? Dead babies aren't funny, Carlos Mencia and Tom Bergeron are funny.

What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

A white man bumps into an Asian man while walking down the street. They have a brief chat. As they part ways, the white man says, "Facebook me!" The Asian man replies, "Due to my socio-economic situation I cannot currently afford an Internet service." So they exchange telephone numbers.

What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

women's rights

potato farming

Star Wars

Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

A Man walks into a car dealership and asks the salesman "How many of these Blue ones do you have in stock" ? The salesman looks at the Man and begins to cry. "Why are you crying" asks the Man "I had a dog named Blue once" replied the salesman. And then he ate a taco in front of the Man,wiped his hands on his slacks and slowly backed away from him. The Man thought to himself..."Gee I'm hungry" and left the car dealership to go buy a taco instead.

Why don't Mexicans sneak back across the border? Because there are more opportunities and free stuff here. Why would they want to leave, especially at the risk of getting caught for crossing in a sneaky fashion?

Looking for a job in this economy is like trying to find employment during an extreme economic downturn.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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