Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

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Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house. No. Neither has he

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Wanna hear a good joke? I don't.

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Two men sit down at a bar. First man: I hear you're having a baby! Second man: My wife had a miscarriage. First man: Oh.... The talking ceased

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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What's big white and cant climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

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Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

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Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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whats worse than bitting into a apple a finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just killed noddy who was hiding in ur apple

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why don't you make like a tree. and get out of here

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Q: What word contains all the letters in the alphabet? A: A made-up word, probably.

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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