What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

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Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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why did the girl fall of the swing because she was pushed of by obama

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What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

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What happened to the jew? He got shoved in an oven.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

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Women's rights.

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My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

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What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

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What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

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A man walked into a bar and said, oppa gangnam style That man is now dead

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

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Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

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Q:Why did the man rob the bank? A:He needed money.... duhhh -Ryan Vallee

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What's the difference between and onion and a dead baby? There is a big difference.

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Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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