What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

Womens rights

What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

Guess What? What? Get in the van.

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

Why did jack fall down the hill ? Because Jill pushed him.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 took 9 behind an alley and raped her.

Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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