What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Carrots! ... well if they were invisible..

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A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

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What do you call a blond harvesting penuts a penut farmer.

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The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

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why did the fox jump over the pen ? it was tuesday

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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A Mexican walks into a club.

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You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

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Jokes are funny.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

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Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

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So I was talking dirty to this deaf chick right...She didn't hear me.

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Q:What did the policemen say to the other policemen? A:Safe

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What did the Sony guy say when he hit the golf ball? PS FOUR!

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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