How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

Roses are red, Violets are not blue, they're violet, which is why they're called violets.

2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

Why did the man walk into a bar? Well hell I don't know I thought you might.

What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

What's big white and cant climb a tree? A refrigerator.

josh roberts you speccy cuunt

Brian Singmaster. Look him up, he's cute.

The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

Why didn't the depressed girl go on facebook? She was dead

I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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