Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what is black and white and red all over.....a nun being murdered

thumb_up thumb_down +12

robin, get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Cheese Toast!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Help! I'm locked in a anti-joke factory!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A pregnant woman is about to deliver. Both she and her husband are very excited about their first child being born. Then, it turn out that their baby has a rare deformation and has no limbs at all. They still love him

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Do you wanna build a snowman? Person: do you wanna live * or nah

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's up? The sky.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops