A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

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dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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2 black guys and a Mexican are in the backseat of a car. Who's driving. The cops

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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This is'nt a joke but like if it pisses you off when people comment on there own joke pretending to be someone else.

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What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

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Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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What if I told you that our role our "little team" is not as little as you think?

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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