What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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Womens' rights.

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Paul Dylan King!

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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potatoes

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? Jamal

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Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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women's lacrosse.

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What do you call a Mexican who gets shot on a golf course? A tragic incident.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 took 9 behind an alley and raped her.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

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You know what's annoying When you suddenly die of a heart attack

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666 im christian

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A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

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cms.......?????

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And then the devil said "Let there be Justin beiber"

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Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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