When life gives you lemons,you say thank you.

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What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

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A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

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Did you know Dr Pepper isn't really a doctor?

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Osama Bin Laden dies.

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Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

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Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

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what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

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What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Cheese Toast!

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What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died...

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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Whats funny? Nick Sotelo

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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Why did the man die? He jumped of a bridge and then got run over by a train.

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops