What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing..

Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house. No. Neither has he

Q: Whats more fun that nailing babys to a fence? A: Ripping them off.

Wanna hear a good joke? I don't.

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

What's big white and cant climb a tree? A refrigerator.

Two men sit down at a bar. First man: I hear you're having a baby! Second man: My wife had a miscarriage. First man: Oh.... The talking ceased

What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

A baby seal walks into a club.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He had a huge appendage; his arm has been swollen from birth. What a bummer

Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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