What animal is green and eats a green rockeater? A green green rockeater eater. What animal is green and eats a green green rockeater eater? A frog.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

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There is a black man and a Mexican standing near the edge of a cliff, the black man turns to the Mexican and says, "We probably shouldn't stand this close to the edge of a cliff" The Mexican agrees and they step away from the cliff.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

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why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

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What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

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Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What was the pirate's favorite letter? Q.

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what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

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wHY DID WILLIAM CHEUNG LICK THE BERILLIAM FUNG, BECause it was fun!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops