why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You have AIDS, I'm very sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's big white and cant climb a tree? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did Tommy cry? His tear glands emptied out of his eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

thumb_up thumb_down +19

I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did the girl fall of the swing because she was pushed of by obama

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What happened to the jew? He got shoved in an oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

thumb_up thumb_down +13

"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the little girl lying on the floor. Because she got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops