Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

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how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

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Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

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A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her statement.

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What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

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What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

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A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The shark replies i dont have cancer just a terrible drinking problem.

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How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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9 little monkeys jumping on the bed... One fell off and died!

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Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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What's 5+7? Piccillo

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem make no sense microwave.

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? Nay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops