Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

What's up? The sky.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

What's so funny about an anti-joke? Nothing.

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

Why did the ckicken cross the road? to kiss my ass

Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

What's worse than a dead man?  2 dead men

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

silly rabbit, rape is for babies

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Grapefruit.

When practicing the art of origami and the berrilium dialates, how many quince pies does it take to calculate a tree? Tricycle

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno, that's why I asked you.

What"s the biggest Jenga game? 9/11

What is good about the holocaust? It is over

What do you call a gay dinosaur? a mega sore ass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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