A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

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What did the scientist say to the postman? So your a postman?

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Womens rights

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Women's sports.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

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Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

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A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

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what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

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how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

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If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Get in the car

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Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

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you know what they say about people with big feet, they have big feet...

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Chuck Norris died.

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Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops