Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

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Roses Are Blue Violets Are Purple Black is Purple Im colorblind

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

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Steve Jobs.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

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"luke Bastiaan" "So, whens your period?"

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What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

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your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

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What does Santa get for Christmas? A shitload of work to do.

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Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

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Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

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A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

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A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, we found your cat's body on the side of the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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