Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What was the pirate's favorite letter? Q.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

how many gay men can you fit on a barstool 1

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

My Girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Homework.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

To mamas so fat shes fat

thumb_up thumb_down +5

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the man die? He jumped of a bridge and then got run over by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops