Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

Why did the man die? He jumped of a bridge and then got run over by a train.

96

Q: What do cows do on the weekends? A: They go to the Moovies Q:What do pigs do on the weekends? A:Go Bowling

dog

How many ears does Chuck Norris have? Two.

What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

Hitler was Jewish.

what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

My mom.

What's silver and bad for your teeth? A wrench

What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

What do you call a fly with no wings? A fly.

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

Why was the boy sad? He had a Ford Taurus stapled to his face.

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

"I love you, you love me" And you didn't just read that; you sang it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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