I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

A seal walks into a club.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

what does trondifly mean? trondify is not a real word.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

What's worse than a dead man?  2 dead men

Why dont dinosaurs speak english? Because a meteor hit the earth and ran them into extinction

What's white and comes out of a long black stick? Milk with a long black straw.

Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

What did one cupcake say to the other cupcake? I want to eat you.

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

So a black man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. He payed for the drink and couldn't have been more courteous

How do you keep a blonde occupied for hours? Put on an entertaining movie.

I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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