Q: What do cows do on the weekends? A: They go to the Moovies Q:What do pigs do on the weekends? A:Go Bowling

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I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

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- How do you keep an idiot in suspense? - How? -......

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Help! I'm locked in a anti-joke factory!

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Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

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what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

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Goon Bear+Homo= Corey Jacobs True Story

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NEVER

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why was the horse sad his wife had terminal cancer

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Do you wanna build a snowman? Person: do you wanna live * or nah

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Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

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Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Here comes a car, It ran over m--

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Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

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What's up? The sky.

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Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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Why did the ckicken cross the road? to kiss my ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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