Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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HARRY EFFING STYLES

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A horse walks into a bar the bar tender says hey you cant be in here you are a horse so the horse leaves.

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Why did Jill fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't Jill get up? She had no legs. Why didn't anyone help Jill up? She had no friends.

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Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

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What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

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Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

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Guess What? What? Get in the van.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a black person? Black people are good at running.

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like my drawing of a white person?

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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The mouse and the elephant went to take a bath. They had a nice time.

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A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

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Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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