how do you kill jesus? with a knife

You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

your mom is so stupid she did not do so well on her IQ test

How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

WHATS WORSE THAN THE HOLOCAUST A FLAT TIRE

Yeah, totally.

why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

Tim's gay.

Why did the blonde fall off of the swing? Because someone threw a machete and it made contact with her skull, thus causing a painful break and rapid blood loss, making it virtually impossible to remain sitting upright.

Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

Two gay men enjoy a wonderful second date together.

What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

What happened to the jew? He got shoved in an oven.

why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

Steve Jobs.

What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

why did the old woman die? Because she was too old to live

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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