A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

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Come over here boy and have a cigar, you're gonna go far. Congratulations on being the first human cannonball, please use the cigar to light the fuse. Happy landings.

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Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Q: What do cows do on the weekends? A: They go to the Moovies Q:What do pigs do on the weekends? A:Go Bowling

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We're out of mustard, so in your sandwich I used some yellow liquid dripping from a dying rhinoceros.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

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How did shaniqua fall of the hill? because the diabito truck ran her over

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

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What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

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My mom.

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

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My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

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Why did the man drop his wallet? Because his palms were sweaty from a long, happy day at the beach with his family after moving into there new home.

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"I love you, you love me" And you didn't just read that; you sang it.

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Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

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Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm horny and your bodily figure is very attractive Get naked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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