If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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Wanna hear a good joke? I don't.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house. No. Neither has he

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing..

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Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

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Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

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Your Mom... is a very nice lady who makes good cookies

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Q.What's worse than running over a dog on the road? A.9/11

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i said why are you disliking me he said its anti joke

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Two men sit down at a bar. First man: I hear you're having a baby! Second man: My wife had a miscarriage. First man: Oh.... The talking ceased

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What's big, and fat? Well, duh an elephant.

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What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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What's black, white, and red all over? A white man's bleeding cancerous tumor.

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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What did the Mexican say to the Black guy? Nice to meet you Mr. President. I'm Antonio Villaraigosa, the Mayor of Los Angeles.

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My mom just died....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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