Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

what do you call a stupid chav? Gifted

Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What do you call a gay dinosaur? a mega sore ass

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

Your computer will self - destruct in 5 seconds

snooki from jersey shore walks into a bar and gets arrested.

I just found out that you can dislike or like something by clicking the thumbs up or down

Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road. A: because he's a chicken?

What's more annoying than Minion quotes? That the girl in the basement keeps screaming for help.

you just lost the game!

What did the deaf, blind, poor orphan get for Christmas? Cancer

roses are red violets are blue last time I saw u were in a zoo don't worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at u

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

What's better than Justin Bieber's new hit single, "Baby"? Everything

How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

How do you make a business man cry? Hit him in the face with a brick

What's the difference between a black guy and a wet towel? The towel doesn't kick when you hang it

So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

What do Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, Slavs, Gays, and Retards have in common? The Holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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