What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

Why was the hamster not on his wheel? Because he had a stroke.

what the orphan boy get for christmas? Not his parents

why did the boy dress up like a girl? because he has autism.

Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

How can an iPhone play music? It has a built in iPod installed.

a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

A horse walks into a bar. It neighs and knocks over a few tables before leaving the bar confused.

Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

What do Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, Slavs, Gays, and Retards have in common? The Holocaust.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog.

Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

Knock knock who's there? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dislike me!

Once upon a time.

Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

Whats worse than receiving a dollar? Receiving a penny.

yo momma is so tall shes tall

A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner fudge is made. This market has a very dynamic and fresh selection.

You know what happens when you assume? You base a conclusion on insufficient information.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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