What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I can't stick my dick in a watermelon.

Justin Bieber

only one person get beat up chuck norris. Who you say? Bruce Lee. He got lucky because his eyes were closed.

Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner fudge is made. This market has a very dynamic and fresh selection.

Do you know how I know that you're gay? You told me you are gay.

If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

If a dyslexic man walks into a bar, check your notes. You told the joke wrong.

Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

A dog walks into a bar and falls on his butt beacause dogs cant walk.

What did the banana say to the bear? Nothing, banana's can't talk.

Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

You want to hear a joke? Democract

What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

Why did the child with terminal cancer and leprosy get sent to the principal's office? Because his parents and brother died in a car accident, and the principal though he should be informed.

What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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