robin, get in the car.

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What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? She was hungry

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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My Girlfriend

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Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

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what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a Ford Taurus stapled to his face.

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Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

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Why dont dinosaurs speak english? Because a meteor hit the earth and ran them into extinction

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So dont touch it

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What's worse than a dead man?  2 dead men

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What is laying in the corner of the living room of an abandoned house and keeps getting smaller over the years? A decaying baby left there by a crack-head.

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You know George Washington? He died.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A tragic accident waiting to happen.

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What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

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What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

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What is one of the symtoms of clinical depression? Sadness.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What is worse than hell?

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austins gay lolololol

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Why did the man say how was your day? because it was the end of the day

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A chinese man, a white man, and a black man are all driving on the freeway. They see each other and wave as they all know each other, and then they focus on the road and drive carefully.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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