Q: what would george washington be doing if he were alive right now? A: screaming in his grave

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did the monkey say to the breast cancer?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

96

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

thumb_up thumb_down +6

You want to know what is worse than having a teen parent? Being a teen parent.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

- knock knock. ... - knock knock. ... - heey! ... (There is nobody at home.)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

My Girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Icecream

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what does trondifly mean? trondify is not a real word.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops