Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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Last night I saw an elephant in my pajamas. I don't know why I went to the zoo in my pajamas.

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What do you call five dogs with no balls? Five bitches.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

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Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

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Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

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Hellen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ERRMMMMM UAHHHHHHHH...

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

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Why did phil krahn go to the store? To get one of those suits

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Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

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Steve Jobs.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

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did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

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What did the black man say when he received cold fried chicken at a restaurant? He very politely asked for it to be warmed up, and exuded nothing but elegance and class.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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How do you get your wife to stop nagging? chop off her head

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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