How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

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Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing..

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What do you call a kid with a peg leg and an eye patch? Names

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Banana(s)

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Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Get in the car

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Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

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There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

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Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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What's funny about being adopted? Your parents never loved you

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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Why is the boy severely mentally scarred? He got raped.

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What's big, and fat? Well, duh an elephant.

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Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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