Your Momma is so ugly, she got plastic surgery.

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Poop

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Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road. A: because he's a chicken?

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots his virgin

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Its Adolf, we're going to camp."

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Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A: "E"

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what the orphan boy get for christmas? Not his parents

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a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

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what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

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your mom is so fat she died of brain cancer

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A horse walks into a bar. It neighs and knocks over a few tables before leaving the bar confused.

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

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What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

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A blind guy sees a nuclear bomb.... he dies.

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What do you call a teacher that gets wasted? A wasted teacher.

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What do Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, Slavs, Gays, and Retards have in common? The Holocaust.

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Asians are ugly and they look they have down syndrome.

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

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Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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