What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, D1ck in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

A man walks into a bar. Jeremy Lin congratulates him for being a person.

What couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

Knock knock? Who's there? The WNBA. LOL

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

Whats sad about 3 mexicans getting hit by a train They were remodeling my kitchen

ruddell and dodds anal

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

what's the funniest anti joke? not this one

GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

What's sad about 3 Black Guys in a Camero? It was my car...

roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

What did the one man say to the other? Nothing, they didn't know eachother

Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

in the begining... god made some stuff

what did the cancer patient get for christmas. -an amputation. Luckily, he was cured of cancer due to the amputation, but died 3 days later in a tragic car accident

Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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