How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

The Economy

21

How did the Jews get out of Germany? They didn't..

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A tragic accident waiting to happen.

Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

What's worse than a dead man?  2 dead men

What do you call a guy who acts straight but is really not? Verl.

What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

Roses are red, violet are blue I have AIDS

What is good about the holocaust? It is over

what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

A straight man walks into a lesbian bar. He quickly realizes his mistake and leaves.

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

Superman: Batman, can you drive? Batman: No, but I can drive the batmobile.

what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

LOOP IN ARE FOR TOYUIL!!!!! HAR HAR HAR!!!!!!!! MOY SAY UHJIN LAK WAQUI SAMPA!!!!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOLOLOLOL IT IS SO FUNNY TO JOKE ABOUT!

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face.

What's better than Justin Bieber's new hit single, "Baby"? Everything

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...