Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

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Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Chuck Norris? Cheese on toast.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

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Q. what did the refuge from uganda say to his mom when he was riding his bike A. look ma no hands.....

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what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

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A black man picks up his phone and calls his wife and finds out he had no wife

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

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"knock knock" "who's there" nobody answered cus it was a bunch of little shits playing knock a door run

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Yo mamma so fat that she was chosen to be a contestant on the Biggest Loser and we are all so proud of the amount of weight she has lost.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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whats brown and black and sits in a tree...... a bird

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Hitler was Jewish.

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what do you call a room full of one terrorist and several babies? dead babies

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Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

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How many jews died in a gas chamber? None because the holocaust is a myth.

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what does trondifly mean? trondify is not a real word.

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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