What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

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Penis.

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your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

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2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

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Baseball

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What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

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Wanna hear a good joke? I don't.

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Well hell I don't know I thought you might.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You have AIDS, I'm very sorry

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Justin Bieber

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What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

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Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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What do you give a Penn State waterboy for Halloween - Candy

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops