knock knock Come in.

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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A man walks into a bar. Realizing that he left his keys in his car, he called a locksmith to unlock the doors. He did not have money to pay this locksmith and was put in prison for his large sums of debt. He was shanked by a fellow inmate and died a few days later in the prison's hospital ward.

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why was the baby crying? a rabit took her bottle and ate her frit snacks.

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knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

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I walked into town today and bumped into a butcher, a baker and a candlestick maker. It meant nothing to me because I was never read nursery rhymes as a child due to my parents both dying before I was conceived

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Why couldnt i think of an anti-joke? cuz i was too high and a fly distracted me

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Knock Knock. Who the hells there? Nevermind.

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YOU IS DUM

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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What do you call a strait man that is also gay? Bisexual.

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

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A man walks into a store and says "Roses are red, Violets are blue, there is a bomb strapped to my chest, give me all the money"

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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Q: Why couldn't the hippopotamus get his driver's license? A: He didn't turn 16 yet.

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Why did the cop not arrest the driver? The Driver shot him 2 minutes earlier.

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You are reading this.Ya you the fat one

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What's white and very boney? A bone

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"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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what's the funniest anti joke? not this one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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