How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

This one time, at band camp we played in a band

what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

What's more annoying than Minion quotes? That the girl in the basement keeps screaming for help.

Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

you just lost the game!

What's better than Justin Bieber's new hit single, "Baby"? Everything

a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

Why did Obama win the president election He had a greater amount of votes that Jonh mccain

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

Asians are ugly and they look they have down syndrome.

Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

A blind guy sees a nuclear bomb.... he dies.

What do you call a teacher that gets wasted? A wasted teacher.

antijokes

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

You know what happens when you assume? You base a conclusion on insufficient information.

Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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