a priest a rabbi and a minister all walk into a bar and the bartender says "is this a joke?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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I scream. You scream. We all scream.

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What is the same about a girrafe, and an ant? They are both REALLY tall. Except for the ant, sorry I lied.

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why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

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What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

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Why did the blonde fall off of the swing? Because someone threw a machete and it made contact with her skull, thus causing a painful break and rapid blood loss, making it virtually impossible to remain sitting upright.

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What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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How did Hitler die? He saw his gas bill

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He didn't have the necessary mental ability or muscle structure to complete said task.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

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If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

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how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

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Why did the lemming jump off a cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

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who smells? •Liam

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What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

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Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops