Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

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Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

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Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

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Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

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Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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What's big white and cant climb a tree? A refrigerator.

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josh roberts you speccy cuunt

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What is black and hangs from a tree in my backyard? My neighbors children.

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You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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What's black, white, and red all over? A white man's bleeding cancerous tumor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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