What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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A horse walks into a bar. It neighs and knocks over a few tables before leaving the bar confused.

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What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

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killing a baby and putting it in one bucket is one thing... but killing a baby and putting it in ten buckets is just insensitive

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What's green and has wheels? A chinese race car driver.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Orange What? Orange Who the hell are you and what do you want? Orange I am calling the police if you do not get off my doorstep in 5 seconds you a$$hole

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? genocide whats worse than genocide? getting raped by a giant scorpion

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog.

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It's kind of hard to die when you're in a freezer.

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Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

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What do Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, Slavs, Gays, and Retards have in common? The Holocaust.

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I enjoy telling anticlimactic jokes Very much.

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2 muffins are in the oven. After about 15 minutes, they both died.

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why is 6 afraid of 7?? because 7 8 9

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You know what happens when you assume? You base a conclusion on insufficient information.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There's no way to know. The chicken can't speak any humanly comprehensible languages so any reason we can determine is pure speculation.

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How much is an abortion? A life

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I can't stick my dick in a watermelon.

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What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

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What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

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If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

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Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops