What did Christopher Colombus say to his men before they boarded the boat to sail around the world? Get on the boat.

A zookeeper, a shoemaker, and a guy named Billy Jones walks into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we closed". So they left.

A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

Roses are red Violets are blue Fvck this poem I'll just go play video games.

whats worse than snakes on a plane? terrorists

What does a kangaroo and a zucchini have in common? Neither one can ride a bike.

Yo momma so fat, she can't preform physical exercises with proper form.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen. You are going to go to jail.

What do you call a blonde with one leg? Heather Mills

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens have short memories and no motivations other than food.

Knock knock *silence* Knock knock *silence* KNOCK KNOCK! Hey! Can't you read the sign?! It's says "Do Not Disturb!"

When Rocky teased Johnny by saying : 'Your momma is so fat , she looks like a hippo.' , He did not know Johnny's mother was suffering a terminal glandular problem combined with an agressive cancer..

What do you call a gay on steroids? Noah Zimmerman!

what's the best part about twenty three year olds? There is twenty of them

why did the chicken jump down the nest after laying eggs without flying? Because there was no ladder!

A mathematician, a physicist and an economist are stranded on a deserted isle in the South Pacific. One day, a lantern washes up on shore. The scholars lament the uselessness of this object.

Why didn't the teacher ask where Billy's assignment was? Because Billy died last week. -B

Whats the best way to take the leaves off the tree? - Cut down the tree-

Junior's love life.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because dead people cannot go to balls.

I am just not using any mentalism nor any of those techniques anymore that is all, is it alright if I call you now?

Roses are red violets are blue why dont u go take a shower

Once upon a time there was a kid he was happy The End

1unno;njfjk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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