friends are like potatoes. if you eat them, they die.

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How come the mexican couldnt support his family? Wendy's stopped hiring a week ago

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So there are 2 ninjas in a dojo, The first ninja turns to the second ninja, and says something in Japanese

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

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You cannot invite, hire people for money and expect loyalty Red, you need to make them earn the right to work for you, merits, background checks, consistency, friend, I can help you with a lot of my own experience, what saddens me about you being the leader, is that you have a good heart. And you are naive, a dangerous combination, if anyone such as Jonas shows up again, your life may be in danger, I mean you know who I am talking about.

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A fat mexican man runs a marathon. Later, he is hit by a bus and raped by a squirrel.

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What do u call 4 black men in a car? A: carpooling

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Hey, you know what'd be funny? A guy having a seizure saying, "Help I'm having a seizure!"

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Why didn't the teacher ask where Billy's assignment was? Because Billy died last week. -B

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josh roberts goes into churches and forces them to listen and go by his religious opinion until they cry

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What do you call a gay on steroids? Noah Zimmerman!

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What's funny about my gay friend? He is a stand-up comedian.

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A mathematician, a physicist and an economist are stranded on a deserted isle in the South Pacific. One day, a lantern washes up on shore. The scholars lament the uselessness of this object.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares

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What's red, black, and blue all over? A canvas with red, black, and blue paint.

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What's the similiarity between a black person and a bicycle? They both work best with chains.

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I am just not using any mentalism nor any of those techniques anymore that is all, is it alright if I call you now?

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A man and a prostitute walk into a bar. they have a few drinks then proceed to a hotel room where the man has sexual intercourse with the woman in exchange for money. The man then leaves while the woman stays in the hotel room and cries cause she hadn't achieved any of her dreams or life ambitions.

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what goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz? baby twins in an acid bath.

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Why was the alpaca sad He just got raped

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Wait your turn patiently.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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A dead guy laying on the floor holding a gun and a knife. What killed him? cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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