How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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why did phil ruin the patio furniture? because he wasnt familiar with the grammar technique used

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

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why did the chicken jump down the nest after laying eggs without flying? Because there was no ladder!

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josh roberts goes into churches and forces them to listen and go by his religious opinion until they cry

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I am just not using any mentalism nor any of those techniques anymore that is all, is it alright if I call you now?

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What's the similiarity between a black person and a bicycle? They both work best with chains.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Cajuns love drinking And drowning too

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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What happened when you heard this joke? You didn't laugh.

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What do u call 4 black men in a car? A: carpooling

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

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What did the anti-joke say to the joke? Your fly is down.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Peoples' bad attempts at Anti-Jokes.

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What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

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A man and a prostitute walk into a bar. they have a few drinks then proceed to a hotel room where the man has sexual intercourse with the woman in exchange for money. The man then leaves while the woman stays in the hotel room and cries cause she hadn't achieved any of her dreams or life ambitions.

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Q: How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I heard this joke before but I can't remember

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knock knock. whos there? ............... stupid kids

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A horse walks into a bar. The impact fractures his skull immediately, knocking him unconscious. He then dies from the resulting brain damage.

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Roses are red violets are blue why dont u go take a shower

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A priest walks into a day care center. He calmly blesses all of the surrounding children a leaves.

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What’s funnier than cancer? Most things, really.

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How come the mexican couldnt support his family? Wendy's stopped hiring a week ago

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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