Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

Two blonds are racing. Who wins? The first one to pass he finish line.

Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing you should be worrying about the future not the past.

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

obama is a good president

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind

what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

Icecream

What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

Q: how do you get a man with one arm out of a tree? A: shoot him

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

What is the diffrence between a strait guy and a gay guy? The strait guy gets into heaven.

What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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