what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

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What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

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What is laying in the corner of the living room of an abandoned house and keeps getting smaller over the years? A decaying baby left there by a crack-head.

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I have read the Terms of Service.

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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The Economy

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A tragic accident waiting to happen.

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You know George Washington? He died.

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Why did the man say how was your day? because it was the end of the day

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Roses are red, violets are blue, cheeseburger.

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Pavel Novak

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nine...eleven

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Three blind men walk into a bar but they were unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from them would be exploitative.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno, that's why I asked you.

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When practicing the art of origami and the berrilium dialates, how many quince pies does it take to calculate a tree? Tricycle

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TRUE COMEDY: "HOW ABOUT THAT AIRLINE FOOD!"

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Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

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Superman: Batman, can you drive? Batman: No, but I can drive the batmobile.

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Why did the mother have an abortion? Because she thought it would best financially for her current family.

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what the orphan boy get for christmas? Not his parents

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Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A: "E"

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A man walks into a bar. Now, that's unheard of !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops