Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

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Q: How many cantaloupes can you fit into Jackie Chan's basement? A: 4

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Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

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Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Well hell I don't know I thought you might.

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Your mother

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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What animal is green and eats a green rockeater? A green green rockeater eater. What animal is green and eats a green green rockeater eater? A frog.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dementia Dementia who Knock, Knock

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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What's worst then lose 100$ Lose 101$

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What do you call a Chinese man in a cage full of Ostridges? A zoo worker.

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Steve Jobs.

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what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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