roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

Did you know why people actually fear clowns? Because slapstick humor is dead

Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

There is a secret society known as Grandma Elbow. What happened to the boy who tried to leave it? All of his limbs were ripped off and fed to a man eating shark by the name of Nigel Tommy Baker. It didn't hurt that much because the boy was forced into eating the waste products of a donkey before this happened. NEVER LEAVE GRANDMA ELBOw!

How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

Banana(s)

Women's rights

A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

Going for the Dislike record woot I farted!

What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

why did dinosaurs die??? because a giant rock blew them up

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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