Situation: A bear is cutting a sunflower's hair Question: How many kangaroos does it take to do surgery on a meatball? Answer: Tomato. Because zebras eat twelve kiwis in a factory every February 29th.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do your friends and a tree have in common? They both die if you set them on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

your mom is so fat she died of brain cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -9

This is not a good joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A jew went to Germany.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Friends and Potatoes are similar...if u eat them try die.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats White and sticky? Semen

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I enjoy telling anticlimactic jokes Very much.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Un petit gars se plante en vélo et il se met à pleurer.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

BUTTERFARTING

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, D1ck in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops