Ask me if I'm a peanut. Are you a peanut? Yes. Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No, I'm a peanut.

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Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

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I only like NY as a friend.

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

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What do the Wizard of Oz, Popeye and my sweaty, fat asshole all have in common? The letter O.

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Whats worse than ten babies in one bin? One baby in ten bins.

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why did the boy dress up like a girl? because he has autism.

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Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have herpes. If I were you I would get tested.

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What do you call a horse with wings? Nonexistant. Welcome to the real world kid.

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This is a joke with a difference. It isn't funny.

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'THIS IS NOT A JOKE, YOU ARE THE 1000000TH VIEWER'...

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What do u call a gay guy with a long dik Dickgimme a lick

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What is black, white, and red all over? A domino dipped in kitten blood.

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Why does World of Warcraft advertise on Anti-Joke? Because World of Warcraft is funny in anticlimactic and alternative way

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NEVER

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

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Hummer.

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Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

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Why does Justin Beiber's asswhole hurt, and his father's dick was brown? Because he ate mexican food and his on his dad's dick.

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

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I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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