So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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NEVER

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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Why dont dinosaurs speak english? Because a meteor hit the earth and ran them into extinction

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What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A tragic accident waiting to happen.

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a Ford Taurus stapled to his face.

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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austins gay lolololol

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What's up? The sky.

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Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

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how do you upset a barber? Murder his family

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Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

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So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

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Why was the kid underwater? He hit a rock.

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baby seal walks into a bar

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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Pavel Novak

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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Your momma's so fat she has fat rolls on her stomach.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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I only like NY as a friend.

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Why did the mother have an abortion? Because she thought it would best financially for her current family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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