what do you get when you mix a bever and a racoon? A bevecoon!

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What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

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yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

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why did the rooster cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

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Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

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A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

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Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

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Three blondes walk into a community college.

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Wats wet and salty and people on the west coast get covered in it? Sweat.

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Tim's gay.

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Hi! This is Richard Young, I'll take it from here Ms.Mcgruder, lets find a quiet place to talk about this, e.c. at 5:00 p.m. tomarrow.

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What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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You are the weakest link. Goodbye.

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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