How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

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I use to be an adventurer like you! Then I got bored.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

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A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

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What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

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austins gay lolololol

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What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A tragic accident waiting to happen.

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What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

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brett is a dick

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Chuck Norris

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How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

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In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

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This is a funny anti-joke. But you probably don't get it.

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What olympic event is Kosovo best known for getting gold? Kosovo is the world's newest country and therefore does not yet have complete international recognition.

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So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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