your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

I ENJOY MASTURBATING

What's red and smells like cherries? Cherries

Roses are red violets are blue this poem make no sense microwave.

Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

Wy did Bryan eet his Dumbelllle? Anderson fell asleep again

Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

What has 14 eyes, 14 legs, 70 toes and 7 noses... 7 people.

What is Chuck Norris's favorite musical theme? Tanana na na naa naa na, ta ta ta tanana na naa na ta na na.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

Whats worse than black people : a grimy old woman lickin your toes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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