Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a truck

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a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

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What happened september 11th, 2001 It was my first time snorkoling in Hawaii

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Knock knock *No one was home*

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Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

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How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? 17

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Why did the plane crash? I don't know. I wasn't on the plane. Its likely, based on the damage, that everyone on board died and therefore couldn't tell you either.

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Why did the black man swim across the lake? He didnt. He drowned

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A jew went to Germany.

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Hello

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Small titties.

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A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my arm! Doctor: It's because your blind son

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how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

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What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

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why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

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Sarah Palin is President

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Why did the math teacher cry during 6th period? He was held at gunpoint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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