What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus.

Why did the bride get a refrigerator for her wedding? Because it is a very nice present

How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

dear GIRLS, roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in the zoo don't be mad i will be there too not in the cage but laughing at u .

your mom is so old she was put in an old age home

What do you call all of the skin around the vagina? a women

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not a very good poet

Why do cows have tails? Because my pet rock stopped breathing.

Wanna hear a good joke? I don't.

What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

why did the chicken cross the road Why not

Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

What's 5+7? Piccillo

knock knock your gay

What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

Two men sit down at a bar. First man: I hear you're having a baby! Second man: My wife had a miscarriage. First man: Oh.... The talking ceased

What is a ghost's favorite dessert? Nothing. Ghosts do not exist, thus they cannot eat dessert.

How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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