Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's blind? No, because he's dead

Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

What would Martin Luther King Jr. be today if he was white? Alive.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog.

Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my arm! Doctor: It's because your blind son

A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

69

why did the chicken cross the road because everyone on the other side already had bird flu

Ever heard about the gray pipes that ran along the walls? Those pipes transmit gas. Gas killed the jews. You sick fucker.

How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

What do you call a black man with scissors.? A Barber.

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

in the begining... god made some stuff

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

Yo mama so ugly... She never got married because most men found it hard to marry her because of her looks

what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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