What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dumb jokes, now shut up.

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what did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? cancer.

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What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

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What do u call a black pope? A poooooopppp!

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What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

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Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

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How many girls does it take to sell out a Justin Beiber concert? None, all of them are boys.

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A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

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Yo mamma so fat that she was chosen to be a contestant on the Biggest Loser and we are all so proud of the amount of weight she has lost.

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What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

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why is my brother white and i am brown? the milk man is very fast!

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigger

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What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

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Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

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Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops