Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which evidently do not understand the dangers of crossing a busy road.

Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

wheres a good place to find funny jokes? anti-joke.com

Q:whats the diffrence between a mexican and a deer A:one is a mexican and the other one is a deer

What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

Four Chavs drove of a cliff today, why was a i sad? It was my car :C

- How do you keep an idiot in suspense? - How? -......

How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

Person 1: It's your birthday? Person 2: Yeah! Person 1: Oh.

why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

Why did the japanese bomb pearl harbor? they wanted to weaken the US naval fleet to stop the US embargo on oil being shipped to japan

What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

Q: What do cows do on the weekends? A: They go to the Moovies Q:What do pigs do on the weekends? A:Go Bowling

A seal walks into a club.

A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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