Dr. Dick Howard Long visits a friend in England. Arriving at his friend's house, he knocked at the door. A butler then lets him in and asks, "Sir, would you like to wait while the Master bathes?" The doctor then replies, "Sure thing, I'll wait until he's done."

What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

I scream. You scream. We all scream.

There was a man who bought a cat. He fed it well. It got so fat.

Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

why was six afraid of seven? cause seven raped and pillaged eight's family.

ive got 99 problems and my diabetes is one of them

Your Mom

Do thumbs down me likes in this anti joke website?

What did the drug addict get for Christmas? He got hepatitis, fired from his job, and nothing from his family because their relationship was badly damaged by his addiction.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape her abusive father

Chayton

Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

An Italian, a black man, and a small child walk into a bar. Shortly after it blew up due to a gas leak. 67 people perished.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

Jim fell of his bike, wanna know how. Someone threw a car at him. Knock knock, who's there, not Jim

Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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