What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

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abcdHIV this disease is killing me

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

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Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

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Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

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How many rats live in a llamas stomach? the cats pajamas

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What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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There is a black man and a Mexican standing near the edge of a cliff, the black man turns to the Mexican and says, "We probably shouldn't stand this close to the edge of a cliff" The Mexican agrees and they step away from the cliff.

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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Mitt Romney for president.

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Chaney is a dumb b****

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Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

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Why dose not the cat bark? Because it's a cat!

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Jake Bowar

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Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

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cot!

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Your mom

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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It's your mother, open the door.

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:-)book

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What's worst then lose 100$ Lose 101$

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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