how do you get a emo kid out of a tree? cut him down get it: because he was depressed and so poor that he couldn't afford a hair cut or new clothes. he also had single mother whose boyfriend sexually abused him so he was confused about his sexuality. Then people just called him "emo" and said he was acting out so they ignored him and he never gave him help when he asked for it because they said he just wanted attention so he killed himself

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what is black and looks like a mushroom? a black mushroom

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how do you confuse helen keller? you put her in a room full of naked men and tell her that they are really candy canes

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

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What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

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How did Jonny die We don't know he was never found

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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What did the girl with no arms get for Christmas? Mittens

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It's kind of hard to die when you're in a freezer.

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What did the man do when he saw the dog? Ran it over

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How many feminist does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to screw it in, the other to suck a dick.

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why was the baby crying? a rabit took her bottle and ate her frit snacks.

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What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

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A man sees the doctor. "Doctor, if I hit myself on my head, it hurts, if I hit myself on my arm, it hurts, and if I hit myself on my leg, it hurts as well." "The case is clear. You need to f*ing stop hitting yourself!"

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Why did the girl go over her texting limit? She had a hot boyfriend.

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Knock Knock. Who the hells there? Nevermind.

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What does Obama and Darth Vader Have in Common? Nothing. Darth Vader is not a real person and thus cannot be compared to the president of the UNited States.

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Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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Knock knock? Who's there? The WNBA. LOL

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whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? ones delicious and the other is a watermelon

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What is the difference between a black guy and an asian? They are both black, except the asian

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NEIL PERT IS THE GREATEST DRUMMER OF ALL TIME!! I LOIVE SMOSH VIDEOS I SEENT EVERY ONE LOLOL

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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