How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

Why was johny late to school? He died

A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? a boyscout comes back from camp.

Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picked her up and then they had sex.

Why did jack fall down the hill ? Because Jill pushed him.

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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