Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

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What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

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Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

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What's faster than a Mexican running away with your T.V.? An Airplane

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How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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What did the anti-joke say? Nothing for it is an anti-joke which is a group of word formed to create a sentence and sentences cannot speak.

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yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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josh roberts you speccy cuunt

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

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Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

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knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

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You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon

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A man. That is all.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

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knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

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What is Chuck Norris's favorite musical theme? Tanana na na naa naa na, ta ta ta tanana na naa na ta na na.

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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