Why did the man drop his wallet? Because his palms were sweaty from a long, happy day at the beach with his family after moving into there new home.

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Alright, if you guess it right, I'll stop playing Mario and finish my division problems. Okay, Mom, call it in the air! Heads or Tails? Huntington's Disease is the reason your Father doesn't remember your name anymore, Billy. There's a fifty percent chance you'll end up with it too. I am so sorry. Also, Tails.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

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what do you call a room full of one terrorist and several babies? dead babies

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guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

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how do you upset a barber? Murder his family

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

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whats 2+2? 69 LOL

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What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

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SAD STORY: Boy: Make me a sandwich. Girl: No.

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So a man rapes a little girl but rips her eyes out before he does it. In court he said the appropriate thing about this was that she could not see it cuming.

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d

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baby seal walks into a bar

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

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A boss walks into a bar and hires the first man he sees. He fires everyone else, no matter what their occupation.

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

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I asked the librarian for a book on suicide. She said "I'm sorry we don't have those in stock." So I just hung myself.

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snooki from jersey shore walks into a bar and gets arrested.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw10xa_xtNg

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Superman: Batman, can you drive? Batman: No, but I can drive the batmobile.

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If you put a bee in the freezer, it will get cold and fall asleep. After it’s asleep, put it in your mouth, but don’t eat it. Just let it sit there. It will get warm and wake up. Now you have a bee in your mouth.

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Situation: A bear is cutting a sunflower's hair Question: How many kangaroos does it take to do surgery on a meatball? Answer: Tomato. Because zebras eat twelve kiwis in a factory every February 29th.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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