what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

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Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

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Bin Laden is dead.

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The doctor comes out of the room and tells the new parents that there is good news and bad news. The couple says they want to hear the bad news first. The doctor says "your baby is black." The couple then ask "what is the good news?", the doctor replies "your baby is dead."

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You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

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What did the computer say to the other computer? Nothing, computers can't talk

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

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Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

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A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

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What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

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666 im christian

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What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

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Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call all of the skin around the vagina? a women

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Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops