- Anti Joke

Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

Why did the man drop his wallet? Because his palms were sweaty from a long, happy day at the beach with his family after moving into there new home.

Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

Knock Knock Bark, Bark, Bark, Bark, YELP! Whimper Whimper... Hey man, come on in.

Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

SAD STORY: Boy: Make me a sandwich. Girl: No.

Roses are red, violets are blue, cheeseburger.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the immigrants.

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms. They were lost in a tractor accident.

A simple country boy and a hugely attractive young blonde sit in the same train carriage. They exchange greetings and pleasentaries, but are quiet for the remainder of the journey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

whats brown and black and sits in a tree...... a bird

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

why cant the black man vote? because hes not 18 yet.

A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

Icecream

What is one of the symtoms of clinical depression? Sadness.