What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

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what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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Friends are like trees. They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

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suck my dick.

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Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

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Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

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If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

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Why did the small child fall down the stairs? Because he had lung cancer was in a wheel chair and I was incredibly tempted to push him down the stairs.

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Congratulations you just won a greencard to the USA! YES YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! WELCOME TO: UNCLEAN SOUTH ARABIA. Press green thumb below = greencard. no srslsy.

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What do you call a Mexican who gets shot on a golf course? A tragic incident.

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Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

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Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

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look left now look right. washing machine

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Never said that friend, anyway I got to put this down, people are asking why I am typing anti jokes. Well, they should all know how much I love spamming by now. ;). Now, you better do not have someone hack this site, it will be a hell of a lot easier explaining this, if this information is not recovered much later, days after getting hacked away. Give it three months, half a year or so, and I will contact you if you like. Have a nice day.

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How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

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What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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