Why was Martin Luther King assassinated? Because he had a mustache.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Boobs are nasty!

thumb_up thumb_down -68

whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Whats purple and fluffy? Purple Fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Why couldnt Jimmy swing on the swing? because Jimmy's a fish

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who is s***ing in my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down +35

"Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock, Knock" "Who's there?" "The police. We're looking for three escaped inmates posing as bananas."

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Usually, the bad (anti) jokes are the ones that don't make you laugh. Sometimes you laugh "with" the joke, other times, you laugh at the joke itself because it is a paragon for human failure. The jokes on this website are not exempt from that rigid stipulation. However, it should be noted that all the "jokes" on this particular website are actually hilarious because of the latter reason delineated in the above paragraph. Additionally, this joke was created by a machine and thus the originator of this work is by no means able to learn from the process of trial and error and therfore can make myriad unfunny jokes without compromise.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Ask me if i'm a fish. Are you a fish? Do I look like a fish?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A: What did the orphan get for christmas? Q: Nothing she doesn't have any parents

thumb_up thumb_down +25

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Connor "Rusty" McLeod

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

barack osama

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why can't the black man get a job? The economy is suffering and unemployment rates are at an all time high

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did video kill the radio star? He slept with videos wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops