What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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NEVER

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I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

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What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

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What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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Q, Where did Rebecca Black go to eat? A. TGI Fridays

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What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

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what do you call a stupid chav? Gifted

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brett is a dick

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Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

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Ya know why I hate bad puns? Because they aren't punny. In other words they have no real plot and don't make people laugh. They actually tend to get quite annoying.

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Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

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why do girls like 77? ................ ...................... ................. ...................... ................ becuz they get 8 more :P

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What did the African boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he celebrates Kwanza.

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A straight man walks into a lesbian bar. He quickly realizes his mistake and leaves.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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God lets 3 people from hell come into heaven every year on chisrtmas based on how bad their last day on earth was. Its chistmas and god is standing a the gate of heaven and the first person comes up and god says, "Tell me what happend to you on your last day on earth" and the man says, " i thought my wife was cheating on me so i went to my apartment to check on her and i saw a man on the deck so pushed him off but i didnt know it was my brother. he caught onto the railing so i smashed his fingers with a sledge hammer and he fell 200 ft. Sadly he landed on a bush and survived and so i took the refridguator and through it on him but right after i did i had a heart atack" Then god lets him in to heaven. Then he has the next person come up and god asks him the same question. the man replies, " i was at my brotheres house when some crazy guy pushes me off the my brothers deck but luckily my fingers get caught onthe railing, Then the crazy guy takes a hammer and hits my fingers and i fall but land on a bush. Then the man throughs a refridguator and i get killed." God chuckles and lets him into heaven. The next person comes up and says," picture this, naked in a refridguator." excpaination: the man in tthe refriduator was cheating with the 1st mans wife.

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Bob: What's gucci bro Tim: Is that a company?

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Sit on Santas lap Boner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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