Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

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The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

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Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

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A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

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Kittens.

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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boobs

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane. A pilot

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A horse walks into a bar...n

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what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

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yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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