Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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Knock knock Who's there? Forever alone Forever alone who? You.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

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Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

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knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

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Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

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Bin Laden is dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

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A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

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Why was johny late to school? He died

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

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Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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