Why is Obama's name Obama? Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

thumb_up thumb_down +9

*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Cheese Toast!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

thumb_up thumb_down +5

knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man and a chicken walk into a bar... I forgot the rest of the joke .... YOUR MUMS A WHORE

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Write your own

thumb_up thumb_down +3

People Eating Tasty Animals

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why does the jailbird sing? It makes Bubba horny.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ...an owl with a bungee cord.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The chicken crossed the road and died. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What was the worst part when 3 Mexican men fell off a cliff? They each were active in the community and had jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call a cat that talks a talking cat

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops