Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

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A British man walks into a dental office.

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Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

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A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dementia Dementia who Knock, Knock

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I like my coffee like I like my women Without a penis

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Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

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What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

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I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

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How many blonds does it take to kidnap a child? One.

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

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Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

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yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

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Q: What word contains all the letters in the alphabet? A: A made-up word, probably.

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What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

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How do you stop a skunk from smelling? Block its nose.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

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What is Chuck Norris's favorite musical theme? Tanana na na naa naa na, ta ta ta tanana na naa na ta na na.

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yo mamas so fat, she started working out

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What has 14 eyes, 14 legs, 70 toes and 7 noses... 7 people.

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ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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