What's retarded and comes from Eygelshoven? Roel van den Elzen

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Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

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Water, please.

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i felt like burning some calories so i lit a fat kid on fire

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"Hello." "Hi."

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What did the banana say to the bear? Nothing, banana's can't talk.

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Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

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I learned a new party trick over the weekend; I swallow a piece of string and it comes out my other end tied! I shit you knot.

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what's funnier than hell? heaven

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ruddell and dodds anal

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what do you call a fish without eyes? a fshhhhh

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

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Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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GAY PEOPLE

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? a boyscout comes back from camp.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their newborn child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops