Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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Lamborghini mercy, yo chick she so thirsty Swerve, swerve

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What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

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My mom just died....

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

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Whats worse than black people : a grimy old woman lickin your toes

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why did the old woman die? Because she was too old to live

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I pissed myself the other day in Harrods when I saw a Somalian boy run up to a curtain saying mummy.

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

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If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

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name-Sally-Sue What I am good at in school: readin' annnd...math. What I need to work on in school: spelin

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Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

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what happened to the chicken that crossed the road? it got hit by a taco truck

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What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was in the oven

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What is a pirate's favourite letter? There is no definitive answer. It depends on the individual pirate, and the environmental and genetic factors that go to make up his or her preference for a particular letter.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

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If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

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Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

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Do thumbs down me likes in this anti joke website?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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