What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

b

What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

What has 14 eyes, 14 legs, 70 toes and 7 noses... 7 people.

What's black, white, and red all over? A white man's bleeding cancerous tumor.

whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

How many ears does Chuck Norris have? Two.

Knock knock! Who's there? Boo. Oh hey man, you got the meth?

Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

How did Hitler die? He saw his gas bill

A black man picks up his phone and calls his wife and finds out he had no wife

Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

A Black a Jew and a Pollack walk in to the bar bartender says "how may i help you gentlemen"

What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

Hey

Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What is red and not there? No tomatoes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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