what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What happened to the jew? He got shoved in an oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I cut my pubes, Now they itch a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Like this joke

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are penis Violets are penis I like penis Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between a grape and an elephant? They are both grapes, except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but you're getting too close And I'm about to file a restraining order, so back up, maybe?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Are you Jewish? No. That's what Anne Frank said, too.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops