1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

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Which one is hardest?

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

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Roses are red, Violets are blueish, Without Hitler, We'd all be Jewish.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting fisted by hulk

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What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

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Rebecca Black.

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Bin Laden is dead.

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what do you call a cup?... a cup

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Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

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Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

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Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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What did the Muslim do after his friend told him a funny joke ? Laugh.

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What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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hi

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potatoes

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Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

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Once you go black you may be more open to dating a second black person.

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A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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