Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

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Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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minorities.

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I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

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Who can jump higher than a mountain? Everyone, mountains are incapapable of jumping.

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Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

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Kittens.

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Whats worse than a flat tire? penile fracture

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

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Bin Laden is dead.

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Why did the archaeologist bury his brother? Because he was dead.

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What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

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I avhe dyiaexls.

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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Why was johny late to school? He died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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