Why is little Susie crying? Her entire family is dead.

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Did you know Hellen Keller's dog ran away? You would have to if your name was RaAeltraERKAERMaelaefa

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Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

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What did my dad say when i knocked over the christmas tree? nothing, my father is dead

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How do you kill a blond wearing a hat? Shoot her in the face.

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What's brown and sticky? The british econonic system from 2 May 1997 to 27 June 2007.

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what kind of panda eats leaves? the gray one :D

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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A guy walks into a bar and says "hey can I get a strong drink" and the bartender says "no we don't allow blacks in this bar" and he was then pushed to the ground and thrown out.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, i was dropped on my head as a baby, 978e456293&*(^$%ZYI467z57967454^&4543^%$54#%^*44jffdGHFYI

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whats 2+2? 69 LOL

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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A guy is playing cod

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Shoot her in the head repeatedly

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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Why does Ron Weasley have friends? He does't. He's a ginger.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest but you mom is a whore

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

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What do you call somebody from Manchester? A twat

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like a cammel, lewis stores his weed in his back

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What is the diffrence between a strait guy and a gay guy? The strait guy gets into heaven.

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What's flatter than a pancake? The baby I just ran over.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

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What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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