What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

8=D

What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

Why dont dinosaurs speak english? Because a meteor hit the earth and ran them into extinction

whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

Dozer has a soul

Grapefruit.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A: You can't wear cleats on a trampoline.

Why did the man say how was your day? because it was the end of the day

How does a pig go to the hospital? Through the front door.

What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

The real Justin Beiber reallly followed me on twitter I deleted my account, set my computer on fire, scattered the ashes and killed myself

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

Why did the plumber kill his family? He wasn't a very good plumber.

Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

What is the diffrence between a strait guy and a gay guy? The strait guy gets into heaven.

What do you call a female duck? A duck.

A chinese man, a white man, and a black man are all driving on the freeway. They see each other and wave as they all know each other, and then they focus on the road and drive carefully.

Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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