why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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Why did the black man swim across the lake? He didnt. He drowned

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im dylan, i wank over teabaging people on cod

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What do you call an Asian pilot? A pilot...

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the ocean? SOL.

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Wanted: A tall, well built woman with good reputation, who can cook Frog's legs, who appreciates a good Fuc- shia garden, classical music and tal- king with out getting too serious. Now read only lines 1,3, and 5

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WTF BOOOOOM

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Bumsniffer

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Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

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69

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Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a cooler? 5. using a blender to puree` = 9

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

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Why does Justin Beiber's asswhole hurt, and his father's dick was brown? Because he ate mexican food and his on his dad's dick.

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why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

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Whats the difference........ between a duck?

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a homosexual jump from a cliff to see who gets to the bottom first. Who wins? Society.

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"Hello." "Hi."

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead.

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minorities.

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Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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