How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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2 peanuts were walking down the street, one was a salted .. the other was raped

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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A man falls into a lake but no one is around to help him, luckily the man can swim so he got out of the lake and went home feeling embarrassed

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Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

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The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

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A black man, an Asian man, and a white man are stranded in the wilderness after their plane crashed. The black man has a flashlight, the Asian a bottle of water, and the white man a can of beans. They put their racial differences aside to increase chance of survival but were eaten by a pack of coyotes.

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Why was the panda sad? It's family died when China had an earthquake.

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A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

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how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

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I ENJOY MASTURBATING

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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If John has 32 candy bars and he eats 28, whAt does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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