What did the Irisman say to the bartender? Don't know? i don't speak Irish?

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why cant blondes water ski.......... because whenever they split their legs they feel somthing wet

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If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

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why couldnt helen keller drive? because shes a woman.

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Billy: Mom.... Dad, I have decided that I want to live on my own. Parents: Great son! We're so proud of you! Billy: Thanks for your support! Your luggage is outside by the taxi.

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What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

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Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

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What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

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What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

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I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

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What's white and comes out of a long black stick? Milk with a long black straw.

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Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

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What is red and not there? No tomatoes.

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What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why did the ckicken cross the road? to kiss my ass

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What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

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What do you call a guy who acts straight but is really not? Verl.

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What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

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Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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one day tiarnan got banged by a goat

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What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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