Why did little Johnny eat his homework? Because his family is very poor and he rarely eats.

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Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There's no way to know. The chicken can't speak any humanly comprehensible languages so any reason we can determine is pure speculation.

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What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

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only one person get beat up chuck norris. Who you say? Bruce Lee. He got lucky because his eyes were closed.

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Bumsniffer

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so a guy walks into the bar...i forget the rest of the jokes but your mother is a whore.

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My mom's dead

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" and the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer.

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I like the Tsarnaev brothers. They ran the Boston marathon and had a BLAST!

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Boobs are nasty!

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What did the banana say to the bear? Nothing, banana's can't talk.

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YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!! why not?

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Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

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why was the man coughing? because there was a knife in his throat.

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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Knock knock? Who's there? The WNBA. LOL

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What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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