roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

What did the man tell his parents after having sex with another man? A. I am gay.

What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

What happened to the jew? He got shoved in an oven.

Q:what has legs but may never walk? A: a table

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

Why can't Jesus eat M&M's? Because they keep falling through the holes in his hands.

Obama.

What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

Trust me im a doctor but this is pratice

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

what does trondifly mean? trondify is not a real word.

Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

Knock Knock. Whos there? Satan.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

Hey

Your momma is so boss that I work for her.

Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

How did the chicken cross the road? He went to the crosswalk so all the cars had to stop for him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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