What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

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Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What do you call a person with no eyes? Blind.

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What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

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Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

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What did batman say to robin befor they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Jokes are funny.

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Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

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Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

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So I was talking dirty to this deaf chick right...She didn't hear me.

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How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

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How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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Billy isn't a homosexual, he just has sex with men. Billy has sex with men, because Billy's in prison.

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A black man walks into a predominantly white bar and is laughed at hysterically, the man is a world class comedian.

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What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

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how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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Timmy stop making noises while mommy is working. I have to finish these TPS reports or else my boss will be very mad at me and we won't have Christmas again.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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