Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Satan.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

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A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

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Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

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What did Stephen Hawking say about Stephen Hawking Anti-jokes? "They're stupid".

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I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

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What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

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Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

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What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

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Q, Where did Rebecca Black go to eat? A. TGI Fridays

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Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

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Ya know why I hate bad puns? Because they aren't punny. In other words they have no real plot and don't make people laugh. They actually tend to get quite annoying.

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brett is a dick

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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This one time, at band camp we played in a band

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why do girls like 77? ................ ...................... ................. ...................... ................ becuz they get 8 more :P

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What did the African boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he celebrates Kwanza.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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