The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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In Soviet Russia, you shit on bird.

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What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

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roses are blue violets are red I am dyslexic and possibly a Jew EJ

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Knock knock Whose there? you you who you know who you are

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Whats worse than a flat tire? penile fracture

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boobs

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What's meaner than taking a candy from a baby? Tossing the baby of a cliff

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- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

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What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

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How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

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Homosexual babies? It's a choice

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Person 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Person 2: Sure! Person:1: That was the joke... You missed it!!!!!

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Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

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Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

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So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops