- Anti Joke

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

CHIIIICKKIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

What do you call a female duck? A duck.

Why did the man drop his wallet? Because his palms were sweaty from a long, happy day at the beach with his family after moving into there new home.

What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

How does Ray Charles see? He doesn't, he plays piano.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

Whats funny? Nick Sotelo

What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...