A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Knock knock whos there punctuation

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Sup homie G. Shutup you are not black.

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Compton

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

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Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

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How do women learn to drive? Drivers ED.

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I ENJOY MASTURBATING

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What happened to the black man when his alarm went off? He got up and took a shower. Then he got dressed and went to church because it was Sunday.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

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Lamborghini mercy, yo chick she so thirsty Swerve, swerve

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whats worse than flunking math? death.

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

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Why didn't the black man pay for his child support bills? He made some unwise financial decisions in the past and is working three part time jobs just to stay afloat.

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what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

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Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

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cory is gay

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Four Chavs drove of a cliff today, why was a i sad? It was my car :C

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What does Osama Bin Laden and the typical Western man have in common? Extensively modern pornography collections.

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What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

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What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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