Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

How do women learn to drive? Drivers ED.

What is Chuck Norris's favorite musical theme? Tanana na na naa naa na, ta ta ta tanana na naa na ta na na.

why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

What do you get a black guy when he is hungry? Something edible.

When I was at the beach digging in the sand I looked down and someone said nehow

A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

cory is gay

Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

"make me a sandwhich bitch" is what he said to his female boss and led to him getting fired and eventually losing his home. Two weeks later his family left him.

I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

What do a grape and a spider have in common? Both have 8 legs..... Except for the grape.

Come over here boy and have a cigar, you're gonna go far. Congratulations on being the first human cannonball, please use the cigar to light the fuse. Happy landings.

onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

How many ears does Chuck Norris have? Two.

Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

A white guy, a mexican, and a terrorist each throw something out of airplane Then they realized it was a bad idea and karma gave them cancer because they may have hurt someone

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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