How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

How do you get a baby out of a blender? With tortilla chips.

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

what is the differents between a baby and a watermelon one is fun to hit the other is just a watermelon

Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

Why did the chandelier fall on the little boy? Hell if I know, the only person who saw it got hit by a chandelier and died.

How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

a little girl gets raped

Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

your mother is so lesbian

What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

An Asian oceanographer went scuba diving in the Pacific Ocean. Three days later the coast guard found his remains torn apart by sharks.

What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. Your family is dead.

im black

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Why does 4 +5 = Hitler? It doesnt it equals 9.

Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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