- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

Why was johny late to school? He died

whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

How do you get a baby to stop crying You kill it

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 took 9 behind an alley and raped her.

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Going for the Dislike record woot I farted!

Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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