How does a pig go to the hospital? Through the front door.

You know George Washington? He died.

What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

So a magician was driving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

So a man rapes a little girl but rips her eyes out before he does it. In court he said the appropriate thing about this was that she could not see it cuming.

Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

Your Mama's so fat she need some serious medication treating overweight.

snooki from jersey shore walks into a bar and gets arrested.

what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots his virgin

What do you call a white man in the NBA? A really good basketball player

I only like NY as a friend.

Whats worse than ten babies in one bin? One baby in ten bins.

My butt!!!!

Why are there no Mexican people on Star Trek? Because the casting director screened thousands of actors and actresses and assembled what he/she felt was the most talented cast to create and sustain a long running television series. Unfortunately no one of Mexican dissent was awarded a role.

What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

Why did little Susie light herself on fire? Answer: She wanted to be warm

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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