Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

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Ya know why I hate bad puns? Because they aren't punny. In other words they have no real plot and don't make people laugh. They actually tend to get quite annoying.

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KIMBERLEY HONEY

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Chuck Norris

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silly rabbit, rape is for babies

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brett is a dick

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This one time, at band camp we played in a band

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42

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Why couldn't the little girl walk? She was raped by a herd of black men, resulting in irreversible damage to her rectum and groin area.

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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co jo kurwa tocza?

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What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

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What happens when you put a bunch of Republicans in a room together? They form a caucus.

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No

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Why did the sponge go to the store? The same reason all sponges go to stores: to be sold to patrons of said store.

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Why are there no Mexican people on Star Trek? Because the casting director screened thousands of actors and actresses and assembled what he/she felt was the most talented cast to create and sustain a long running television series. Unfortunately no one of Mexican dissent was awarded a role.

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When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

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How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? 17

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog.

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What do you do when you're making out with your girlfriend? Play with another dude's ass.

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what do you call a black person in a electronic store? a customer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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