What do you get when you cross a chicken with a beagle? An abomination.

What is the difference between a black guy and an asian? They are both black, except the asian

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

Roses are red, Violets are blueish, Without Hitler, We'd all be Jewish.

Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

Why did video kill the radio star? He slept with videos wife.

How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

What's meaner than taking a candy from a baby? Tossing the baby of a cliff

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

i hate you.

Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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