Your Mom... is a very nice lady who makes good cookies

An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

Why was the boy upset? Because he has a frog stapled to his face.

What did the mail man say to the resident? I have your mail. Now let's f*ck.

How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was on his way to a friends house, after being kicked out yet again because his parents are homophobes and can't come to terms with his sexual preferences. When he got there, his friend was already asleep and he had to sleep in the gutter. He then got a cold and died because his immune system had been weakened by aids. His parents still didn't accept him, and didn't go to his funeral.

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

I scream. You scream. We all scream.

Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

Freddie Mercurys teeth

Women's rights.

Roses are red, Violets are blue.

a priest a rabbi and a minister all walk into a bar and the bartender says "is this a joke?"

What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

b

Women's rights.

why was six afraid of seven? cause seven raped and pillaged eight's family.

My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

Penis!

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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