roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

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A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

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what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

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Why did the boy cross the road Because he needed to get to the bus stop

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i hate you.

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How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

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whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

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What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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really desperate to get laid guy gives out phone number in random places 5802352343 :D

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their newborn child.

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What is brown and sticky?

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

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A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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