What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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Bin Laden is dead.

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What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

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What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because his name was Hugh Jass.

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here's a great way to ruin someone's 'knock knock' joke: Knock knock Come in!

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I don't often drink beer. But when I do, I recklessly beat my wife and kids.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

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whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

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Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

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What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

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I'm not as random as you think i salad.

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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