What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

"Roses are Red" "Violets are Blue" That's what they say, But it isn't true. Violets are violet, Now stop sniffing glue!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the girl cross the road? She didn't. Well, she tried but when she was halfway there, she was hit by a bus and had to be rushed to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

WALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXT

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why couldn't the prostitute count to 70? She grew up in a poor family and couldn't pay for a good education.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

-What's the difference between a frog? - it jumps higher.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A handicapped man rolls into a bar. He buys a drink, talks for a while, and rolls out.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw10xa_xtNg

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did oprah, your mother, and a monkey on a rock have in common? the ability to fornicate

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

thumb_up thumb_down -7

tim rafter died no one cared

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: Why did the young boy run away from girls and screamed that they had cooties? A: That's what little boys do. He also has an abusive home life

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do the Wizard of Oz, Popeye and my sweaty, fat asshole all have in common? The letter O.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why was the cow laying down? because little johnny shot him with a 50 calliber

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a completely legit reason dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What flys? A fly

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops