Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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What smells, tastes, and looks like trash? Garbage.

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What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

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Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

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Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

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A British man walks into a dental office.

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Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

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Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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do you know what's so funny? yup

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im black

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Tim's gay.

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why did the baby cross the road...? cause he was chained to my bumper

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Dementia Dementia who Knock, Knock

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What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

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Why did the boy stop playing nintendo 64? He choked on a red M and M and struggled for air until he fell lifelessly on the floor, landing on his pet mole, furthermore, dying and killing the animal as well. It was loose loose situation.

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Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

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Your mom is so dumb, she has difficulty acquiring a job to support her family.

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What did the mushroom jock say to the mushroom nerd? your and ugly wimpy mushroom....and i am on steroids

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Q: Why do so many of these anti jokes contain refrigerators? A: Seriously I don't know why

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What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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