knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Teen pregnancy

Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

Wanna hear a joke the WNBA

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Chuck Norris died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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