What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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Knock Knock Bark, Bark, Bark, Bark, YELP! Whimper Whimper... Hey man, come on in.

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Where did John go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? Because they were part of his uniform.

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KIMBERLEY HONEY

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Ya know why I hate bad puns? Because they aren't punny. In other words they have no real plot and don't make people laugh. They actually tend to get quite annoying.

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baby seal walks into a bar

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What's the opposite of Them Cox? Deez Nuts

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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Three blind men walk into a bar but they were unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from them would be exploitative.

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Why couldn't the little girl walk? She was raped by a herd of black men, resulting in irreversible damage to her rectum and groin area.

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why do girls like 77? ................ ...................... ................. ...................... ................ becuz they get 8 more :P

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

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How do you stop a plane? Throw flying birds at it.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Penis

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When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

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Akshaytiger World

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Whats worse than ten babies in one bin? One baby in ten bins.

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A man walks into a bar.

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What's worse than dropping your phone in the toilet? Drinking only milk and honey for 7 days and then getting diarrhea while lying chained up completely naked with red fire ants going up your anus and all over your body while you get eaten alive in slow painfully miserable death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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