A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

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What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

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How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

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whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

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The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

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Once you go black you may be more open to dating a second black person.

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Do you know that car over there? No.

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"This is not a drill!" - guy holding a hammer

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Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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dead babies

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You wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? I slipped in mud. Wanna hear an even dirtier joke? Bubbles is a guy..

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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