I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

Im gonna Rape that Liberato kid you was talking about, ALL UP THE ASS i will find him.

Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

A black goes to college

Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

What do you say to the man with lopsided balls? I am terribly sorry, your condition has most certainly left you socially alienated and confused.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

hi

If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

boobs

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

Homosexual babies? It's a choice

People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

Go figure, you seemed pretty fucking scared of me back then. "autocast" hypnotic priming, anchors, you know what that is right? You for (as an example) clap your hands whenever you succeed at hypnotizing yourself while staying awake in a lucid state, then you repeat it until you one day just clap, your body remembers the whole sequence and boom it works right away. You did not think that PaulMcKenna could just touch people and have them do what he wants without even telling them what to do right? Especially not McKenna, I learned a lot from Richard Bandler, absolutely nothing from Anthony Robbins, everything I could ever want from Igor Ledochowsky, and absolutely nothing from PaulMcKenna, I went to him last, I should have skipped Both Robbins and Kenna, they use NLP and... Basically call it hypnosis.

what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their newborn child.

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it. How do you make it stop crying? You throw another brick at it.

What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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