A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

Knock knock It's open, come in.

Why does 4 +5 = Hitler? It doesnt it equals 9.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

FIONN'S HAIR 1 LIKE = £1 FOR A HAIRCUT

Why did the monkey eat his own poop? Because there was minimal resources where he was so he resorted to eat his own fecal matter

So two Jews walk into a bar... Its nice that they take missionary work to new heights

knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? That she should train harder for her next boxing match, or find a less physically demanding hobby to partake in.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

Women"s Rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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