The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Yo momma is so ugly, she might not win the "America's next top model" contest.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A horse walks into a glue factory..

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. Your family is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Tim's gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Hey are you from Tennessee, 'cause you have a very nice accent.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call a Chinese man in a cage full of Ostridges? A zoo worker.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why was six afraid of seven? cause seven raped and pillaged eight's family.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Wats wet and salty and people on the west coast get covered in it? Sweat.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Someone told me about this website.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a black person that went to medical school? A doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats the best thing that happened to the jews The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's a mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

cot!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What did the anorexic girl do for thanksgiving? A: Nothing, she was paralyzed from a fall 2 days prior and nobody had found her yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your Mom

thumb_up thumb_down +13

An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I came.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops