What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

What did the blind, deaf rabbit get for Easter? . . . Eaten by a by a lion.

Whats big, brown and can jump really high... A kangaroo

knock knock, who's there? you goodbye

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

A Mexican walks into a club.

Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

your life

What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

What's worse than failing out of high school? Finding out your mom has cancer.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not a very good poet

Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

Whoa! A talking carrot!

How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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