Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? A pharmacist

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What did the Irisman say to the bartender? Don't know? i don't speak Irish?

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NEVER

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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what do you call a room full of one terrorist and several babies? dead babies

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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Bobby walked into a bar. He was then escorted out of the bar and arrested because he was underage.

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how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

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Dozer has a soul

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What do you call a female duck? A duck.

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber.

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Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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Why does this dog have herpes? Global Warming.

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How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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So a man rapes a little girl but rips her eyes out before he does it. In court he said the appropriate thing about this was that she could not see it cuming.

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Q:Whats funny? A:Genocide

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Why did the jew break his iPhone? He dropped it when i shot him in the face.

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops