yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

Banana(s)

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

Patrick is gay

A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

Wanna here somethin funny? Nope.avi

What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

Why do you bury an Asian on the side of a hill? Because he's dead.

How many blonds does it take to kidnap a child? One.

A Muslim blows up a bar

So two Jews walk into a bar... Its nice that they take missionary work to new heights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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