Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

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Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

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The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

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Do you know that car over there? No.

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From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

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Whats worse than HIV? AIDS

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Patrick is gay

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

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Haiku's Are Easy. But Don't Always Make Much Sense. Refrigerator.

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Stevie wonder walks across the road without looking both ways.

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A British man walks into a dental office.

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Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

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Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

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knock knock your gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops