Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

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why do black people hate aspirin? Its white, it works, and you have to pick cotton to get to it.

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What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? The police Johnson Oh, come in Mr Johnson

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What is 69? A number that is before 70 and after 68

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Q: I am an over-protective father looking for my son who was kidnapped and am suddenly traveling with a mentally retarded woman who cant remember her name. By the way my wife was murdered and my son has physical disorder. Then, im hooked up with a hippy who doesnt care about anything. Who am I? A: Marlin the clownfish (from Finding Nemo).

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Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

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Q. What did the priest and the atler boy do in the back room of the church? A. Disscussed their feelings about the different meanings that could be derived from the daily scripture reading.

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Knock knock It's open, come in.

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Why does 4 +5 = Hitler? It doesnt it equals 9.

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FIONN'S HAIR 1 LIKE = £1 FOR A HAIRCUT

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What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

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How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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So two Jews walk into a bar... Its nice that they take missionary work to new heights

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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