Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

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What's silver and bad for your teeth? A wrench

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What's the opposite of Them Cox? Deez Nuts

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Why couldn't the prostitute count to 70? She grew up in a poor family and couldn't pay for a good education.

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Why did the Jew ask for a napkin? something funny about the holocaust

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This one time, at band camp we played in a band

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Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

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Roses are red Vilots are blue God made people pretty What the happend to you

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what the orphan boy get for christmas? Not his parents

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This difference is due largely to the alteration of the white light wavelenght as it excites the electrons in both flowers and the absorption of most of the other colours of the spectrum.

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Roses are green Violets are green I'm colour blind Everything is green

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Your breath smells like onions.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? The couple discuss possible names and then pick the one that they feel suits the child best.

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Why did Harry go to the store? He was out of food.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

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When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

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Why was the white man arrested? He was a rapist.

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Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

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Once upon a time there was a prince and a princess. They married as was the social custom of the time, and produced a series of children whose purpose was to sustain the royal bloodline for many years to come. AF

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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