Why did the girl cross the road? She didn't. Well, she tried but when she was halfway there, she was hit by a bus and had to be rushed to the hospital.

Your Mama is so stupid She shot herself by accident and died. Your family has not stopped mourning since

What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

A man walks into a bar.

What happens when you put a bunch of Republicans in a room together? They form a caucus.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister are in a boat in the middle of the lake when a lightning bolt flashes out of the sky and hits them. Fortunately, no one died because only about 10% of those struck are killed.

What's worse than dropping your phone in the toilet? Drinking only milk and honey for 7 days and then getting diarrhea while lying chained up completely naked with red fire ants going up your anus and all over your body while you get eaten alive in slow painfully miserable death

tim rafter died no one cared

Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

No

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a completely legit reason dumbass

A man walks into a bar. Now, that's unheard of !

What is worse than falling into a pit of needles? being lit on fire and then falling into a pit of needles I imagine

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

Friends and Potatoes are similar...if u eat them try die.

What do you call an Asian pilot? A pilot...

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Guy 1: Yo dawg Guy 2: DID yOU JUST FUCKING CALL ME A DOG>/?>/???? Guy 3: Yea

Why couldn't Little Timmy see the pirate movie? Because Little Timmy was blind.

BUTTERFARTING

What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

Why was Martin Luther King assassinated? Because he had a mustache.

What does Pontiac stand for - People Of Normal Thinking Intelligence Acting Classy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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