Why was johny late to school? He died

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A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

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i like my women like i like my coffee...big boobs

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yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

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Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

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What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

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Banana(s)

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

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How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

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A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Who are you?

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What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

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Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

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Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

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A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? Getting life imprisonment after...

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops