Lamborghini mercy, yo chick she so thirsty Swerve, swerve

thumb_up thumb_down +16

ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happened to the black man when his alarm went off? He got up and took a shower. Then he got dressed and went to church because it was Sunday.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why didn't the black man pay for his child support bills? He made some unwise financial decisions in the past and is working three part time jobs just to stay afloat.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Knock Knock! Who's There? Not Steve Jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I like my women like I like my coffee... Without a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the tortoise beat the hare. The tortoise had carcinoma thyroid cancer in the renal pelvis uterur.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Windows Vista

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair, fuzzy wuzzy had cancerand died

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats funnier than killing a black guy. Nothing, it's not funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

HTML

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops