Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the old woman die? Because she was too old to live

thumb_up thumb_down +12

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples, how many pancakes can hit the roof? ...Purple!! Because aliens don't wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Communism

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair, fuzzy wuzzy had cancerand died

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The procrastinators association meeting has been postponed. - Anonymous

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Jesus say to the Easter Rabbit? Nothing, it ran off before he could say anything. They're so skiddish, those pesky rabbits...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why should this joke be funny? It shouldn't, because its an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats brown and black and sits in a tree...... a bird

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats funny? Nick Sotelo

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops