What's the difference between a Jew and a black person? Black people are good at running.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

women's lacrosse.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +29

dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats the difference between a black person , spook and a porchmoney.... there is none there all stupid stinky n-ag-ger-s

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +25

In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was the asian guy's eyes slanted? Your question is a very valid one that most people often wonder, but never really ask. It's called an epicanthal fold...please, NOT "slanted eyes". Many people consider this to be a derogatory description of the descendents or those of Eastern Asia (as do I, being half Korean), but most people are unaware of this and say it anyway. I'll assume you didn't know this. :) The epicanthal fold (what we have) is something that all babies are born with, but those who may not be of Eastern Asian origin will eventually lose. The purpose of this "fold" is to protect the eyes from extreme sunlight and cold weather. Most people of the this part of Asia originated in Mongolia where the weather conditions were very cold and harsh. Also, with most of this population, you'll notice that there exists some extra padding below the eyes as well. With all that white snow and the sunlight reflecting off of it, don't you think with time our bodies would develop some sort of defense for one of our most valued senses--our sight? It makes sense, doesn't it? Also, notice, that the farther south you travel in Eastern Asia the "rounder" the eye gets (their is less evidence of the epicanthal fold), since the climate gets warmer the farther south you go. Evolution, baby. So, Eastern Asian eyes are NOT really slanted. They just appear to be. Instead they just have that extra fold above the eyes that make them appear "thinner", if you will. If you want to sound halfway intelligent, please don't use the description "slanted eyes" anymore, since this will only make you seem like somewhat of a bigot (racist). (You might say it around the wrong person one day.) Sorry, but I'm just trying to give you some good advice. I hope I helped.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Disc . Disc Who. Disconnected.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the dead baby say to his mother? Nothing. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what's long, skin colored, erect, and limp? a finger.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Roses are red violets are red, the grass is red Holy crap! My yard is on fire!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why do cats hate dogs? because cats were bullied by dogs in highschool.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's longer then Kim Kardashian's Wedding? 73 days.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops