How do you stop a plane? Throw flying birds at it.

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Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Rape.

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co jo kurwa tocza?

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Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

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Knock knock. Come in.

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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Why did the Nigger fuck shit? He was a shit fucking Nigger.

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whyo black peopple lie koolade the like the taste

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What did the man do when he saw the dog? Ran it over

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what do you call a needle with two heads? a two headed needle

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Why does Helen Keller only masturbate with one hand? Because she's moaning with the other.

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What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravity

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a man and a woman are standing at a bar. they have a few drinks and then go home and die.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a big dick, Now suck it you fucking bitch!

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What does a bug do in a telephone booth? Eats yogurt.

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this is an anti joke.... Get it yet

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

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A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

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alright whoever posted it, like this, then comment your first name

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Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

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World Of Warcraft

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Why did the cow cross the road?..I didn't know the intentions of the cow, but an elderly woman in an automobile experienced a collision with the animal that ended not only the life of the cow but of the elderly woman as well.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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