Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

So there was a pirate, he got shot in the back. And when he got shot he turned to his freind (fellow pirate) and said i have been shot and there is a pretty good chance i will die.

What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

What did Steven Hawking say to God after he died? Nothing. He can't talk.

Knock knock (No one is home)

What s faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

What did the bubble do to the wall? Nothing it is a Bubble.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

Q. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT GEORGE BUSH? A. NOTHING

Q: What happens when you throw a green rock in the Red Sea? A: It gets wet.

Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

GONNA

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

Do you know that car over there? No.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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