If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

guns don't kill people. casey anthoney kills people.

Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

Why did the plumber kill his family? He wasn't a very good plumber.

-Hey, Larry! How much is one plus one? -Two

baby seal walks into a bar

You wanna hear a joke about my penis Nevermind, it would be inappropriate of me to say such a thing.

Knock Knock Bark, Bark, Bark, Bark, YELP! Whimper Whimper... Hey man, come on in.

"Roses are Red" "Violets are Blue" That's what they say, But it isn't true. Violets are violet, Now stop sniffing glue!

Me: do u you want to here a joke You: ya Me: Woman's rights

Why did the old lady but her Jelly In her roller skates and dress them up like a doll? She has Dementia

What the diffrence between a jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven

Why did the girl cross the road? She didn't. Well, she tried but when she was halfway there, she was hit by a bus and had to be rushed to the hospital.

How did the Jews get out of Germany? They didn't..

Your momma's so fat she has fat rolls on her stomach.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...