what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

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9/11

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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What's more dangerous than bungee jumping without a rope? Getting into a car with Ben Colbert.

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Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

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Whats the difference........ between a duck?

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What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

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"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

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What do you call a black man with scissors.? A Barber.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

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How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

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Roses are red, Violets are blueish, Without Hitler, We'd all be Jewish.

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how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

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Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by it surroundings, and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

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How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

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Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

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why did the fox jump over the pen ? it was tuesday

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A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

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crime in multi story is wrong on so many levels!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a whore, Let's have sex.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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