What do you call a black person trying to swim? Wet.

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how do you say desk in spanish? escritorio

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

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Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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what a tomato would say if his friend would be hit by a car? Nothing because tomatoes can't speak

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WNBA

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what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

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whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

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Like this joke

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

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cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair, fuzzy wuzzy had cancerand died

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A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

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A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

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What's black and white, and red all over? newspaper...

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i like my women how i like my coffee ....i dont like coffee

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An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

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HTML

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If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

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Are you Jewish? No. That's what Anne Frank said, too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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