Mitt Romney for president.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

abcdHIV this disease is killing me

Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

This is a humorous joke, you will laugh.

The pennis has a tuff life, his best friend is a pussy, his neighbors is an A hole, his family is nuts, and his master beats him.

Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

what a tomato would say if his friend would be hit by a car? Nothing because tomatoes can't speak

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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