Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7,8,9! (Also it killed his family and nuked his country too)

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Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

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A priest, a rabbi, and an atheist walk into a bar. They sit down and have a calm discussion about the differences in their beliefs.

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roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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Women

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

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What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

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What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

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What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

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How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

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Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

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What does mens "man sauce" and babies have in common? They're both fun to make and easy to kill...

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what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

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Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops