what did the joke say to the anti-joke? do you want to fight

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Wow, thats warming to the core Nero, you are really sweet when you want to, I was having a lot more than second thoughts, I mean I do not mind the thought of sex with you really and I mean that, but losing who I already consider my best friend would just be sad. So uh, sex once huh? I mean, one more feather on the uh, hat thing, is that what this is about to you?

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I scream. You scream. We all scream.

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Why didn't the black man pay for his child support bills? He made some unwise financial decisions in the past and is working three part time jobs just to stay afloat.

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

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What did the black man say when he received cold fried chicken at a restaurant? He very politely asked for it to be warmed up, and exuded nothing but elegance and class.

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What do you call a bus full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy

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How do you get your wife to stop nagging? chop off her head

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A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

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How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

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How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

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What is a pirate's favourite letter? There is no definitive answer. It depends on the individual pirate, and the environmental and genetic factors that go to make up his or her preference for a particular letter.

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Why did the man jump off of the cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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two muffins are in an oven. 30 min. later i ate a delicious treat.

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"did you hear about the midget's self-murder?" "No, what happend?" "He jumped off the curb"

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? During the crossover episode of Blossom and Star Trek: Voyager. Six traveled ahead to the distant future and found herself on the aforementioned starship. Her situation was confusing and frightening, even more so when the half-female, half-Borg appeared before her.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? over 100

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NEVER

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A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

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Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Satan.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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