There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

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How do you find Nemo? Watch the movie.

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What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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Wanna hear a joke the WNBA

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Your mom is so dumb that she failed to pass her 11th grade year, forcing her to drop out to get a GED and spend the rest of her life at a dead end job

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

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Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

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A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

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why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

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What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

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Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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a boy walks in a house and mother says hi who are you and the boy says does it really matter whad really maters is wht you will do about your dead son

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Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

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What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

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What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh.

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WNBA

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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