Jewish People

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Whats black, white, and read all over? Micheal Jackson reading a book while painting himself red.

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My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Your dad is so dumb he tried to put M&M's in abc order

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A man walks into a car dealership. The salesman was nice and he bought a Mercedes.

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I came.

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Why did the man have cold feet on his wedding day? The wedding was outside in the winter.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

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What do you call someone who states the obvious? Someone who states the obvious.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

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I am just trying to grasp the terms you use Nero, you are a genius, I mean I always heard about it, but honestly, well, my first impression of you here was... Different.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Do yo know what a decasexual is? A decasexual, as defined on various websites, is somebody who has strong physical attractions to male humans, female humans, male animals, female animals, sounds, smells, tastes, feelings, movements and objects. The term decasexual derives from the latin language, meaning "ten sexualities". Decasexuals exist everywhere.

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What's the easiest way to kill a blond? You stab her.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -I don't care

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what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The KKK

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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