Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

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What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

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What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

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your mother is so lesbian

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: Nothing Really

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

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yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

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Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

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Wanna here somethin funny? Nope.avi

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A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Q. What did the priest and the atler boy do in the back room of the church? A. Disscussed their feelings about the different meanings that could be derived from the daily scripture reading.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. Your family is dead.

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2 gingers went to a pumpkin patch... And nobody ever found them( life lesson, don't take your ginger to a pumpkin patch)

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Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

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What lives underground? Grandpa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops