Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

???????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????? I cant make a good joke.

There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

Whats worse than HIV? AIDS

A man walks into a bar. End of story.

What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

look left now look right. washing machine

What lives underground? Grandpa

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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