Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

World Of Warcraft

"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

your momma so ugly even she wouldnt date herself.

What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

What do you say to the man with lopsided balls? I am terribly sorry, your condition has most certainly left you socially alienated and confused.

Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

What did you say? I don't know.

man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

Why did little susie fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock who's there? not susie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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