A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "My son was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer."

An octopus walks into a bar. The people in the bar, realizing the potential of danger, stand up and leave the bar quietly.

What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

where do the women go? the womanarium

-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. It's funny because the robot has no arms.

A man is walking alone in a park and stumbles upon a lamp. He rubs the lamp and a genie appears out of thin air. The genie tells him he has three wishes to wish for whatever his heart desires. The man naturally wishes for Anthony Davis to shave his damn unibrow. He then throws the lamp at a little boys face and laughs uncontrollably.

Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

Whats funnier than killing a black guy. Nothing, it's not funny.

American Idol

What's red and green? A frog in a blender

Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

Hey

What do Chuck Norris and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They are both white, male, good actors, white, rich, and white. Except for the eagle.

"Roses are Red" "Violets are Blue" That's what they say, But it isn't true. Violets are violet, Now stop sniffing glue!

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

i had a bowl of soup and it was 5 inches in diameter and 3 inches tall. how much soup did i eat? very little because i drank most of it

whats worse then finding out your girlfriend cheated on you.. -9/11

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

Is you refrigerator running? That's odd you should call the cops about that one!

How many Aodhan's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Aodhan's da has already screwed all the lightbulbs...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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