How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

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25

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

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What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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Your mom is so fat, when she sat on a lump of coal she didn't realize she sat on a lump of coal.

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i hate you.

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A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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2 gingers went to a pumpkin patch... And nobody ever found them( life lesson, don't take your ginger to a pumpkin patch)

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What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Baseball

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Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

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What do you call a fat legless over weight black man called Tom. Tom.

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What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

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Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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