why did the 14 year old girl cross the road? to get an abortion of the child she became impregnated with after getting raped.

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Boy: BRB Girl: OK. *Two hours later* Boy: Back. Girl: What took you so long? Boy: Someone asked why I loved you. Girl: Aw, that's so s- Boy: I know! I had no idea who he was! I had to call the cops.

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How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

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a

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

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My Bologna has a first name, it's Tim.

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Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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what a tomato would say if his friend would be hit by a car? Nothing because tomatoes can't speak

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

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What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

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-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

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96

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said the the man running the stand hey ba ba ba got any grapes? the man said no but i got some shut the F*CK up!

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What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

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I hate being bipolar, it's so awesome.

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How do you know when your sister's on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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