People Eating Tasty Animals

What's the opposite of Them Cox? Deez Nuts

In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

Knock knock. Who's there? Pizza. Pizza who? Delivery.

Three guys walk into a club, one is a fat ugly chode face bastard, the second one is a 4 foot 2 cricket champion and the third is a handsome young man.

Chuck Norris

What olympic event is Kosovo best known for getting gold? Kosovo is the world's newest country and therefore does not yet have complete international recognition.

what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

Situation: A bear is cutting a sunflower's hair Question: How many kangaroos does it take to do surgery on a meatball? Answer: Tomato. Because zebras eat twelve kiwis in a factory every February 29th.

A man walks into a bar.

-What's the difference between a frog? - it jumps higher.

I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

you just lost the game!

Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

Why did the sponge go to the store? The same reason all sponges go to stores: to be sold to patrons of said store.

Q: Why did the paraplegic go to the gym? A: to watch his friend work out

how do you get a emo kid out of a tree? cut him down get it: because he was depressed and so poor that he couldn't afford a hair cut or new clothes. he also had single mother whose boyfriend sexually abused him so he was confused about his sexuality. Then people just called him "emo" and said he was acting out so they ignored him and he never gave him help when he asked for it because they said he just wanted attention so he killed himself

A man walks into a bar. Now, that's unheard of !

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? Lots of stuff.

Religion

Knock knock who's there? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dislike me!

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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