What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick

If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

why is the room so dark? because the light is not on.

lewis bedford

Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

What is as ugly as Justin Bieber's face? Justin Bieber's face.

A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

knock knock your gay

Women's rights

What did the mail man say to the resident? I have your mail. Now let's f*ck.

Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

yo mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the size of the door...

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

What's big, white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

What rhymes with turtle? Rape

Why was the black man escorted out of the bar. He was 10

You play the piano? What more can you do? Sounds complicated but try me.

What is white on the top and black on the bottom? Society

How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

When does a blond laugh and cry? When she's raped by a clown.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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