A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

a black guy leaves prison

Why is Santa's sack so big? His doctor recently diagnosed him with testicular cancer.

Knock Knock. Shut up.

guess what? chicken butt.

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

What did the kettle say to the pot? Nothing, inanimate objects can't talk.

Why did the Octopus jump off the bridge? To breathe

Knock Knock Who is there? You have no Dick

Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, it is unclear what the chicken's motivation to cross the road was.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the light was green

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

Women's rights.

If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

Knock knock Violets are blue Helen Keller The Holocaust.

FIONN'S HAIR 1 LIKE = £1 FOR A HAIRCUT

What's white and sticky? Glue

What do you call a can of beans? A can of beans.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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