-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

Whoa! A talking carrot!

From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

Why was Lucile crying? Because she was sad.

Fuck her

WNBA

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

A rabbi, a preist, and a homosexual are at a bar... What a fine example of a well cultured community.

Knock knock It's open, come in.

Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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