How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

look left now look right. washing machine

Q How do you make pie. A You cook it

What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh.

What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

Why couldn't the young boy go trick or treating? He was a diabetic.

What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: Nothing Really

What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

a rabbi sees a nazi in time square. he simply walks past because as we are in america the nazi can do nothing to harm him.

knock knock who's there a black person SHIT!!!!

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

Fuck her

Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

A Muslim blows up a bar

jewish people like other jewish people.

Last night I saw an elephant in my pajamas. I don't know why I went to the zoo in my pajamas.

FIONN'S HAIR 1 LIKE = £1 FOR A HAIRCUT

One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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