Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

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Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

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What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.

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http://www.fotokristall.narod.ru/mov0001.swf

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pizza. Pizza who? Delivery.

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People Eating Tasty Animals

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Yo Momma is so ugly she probably doesn't have any friends.

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Chuck Norris

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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want to go home? yea

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What is Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin'

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A jew, an Arab, and A Scientist walk into a bar. The arab self explodes and kills them all

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

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how do you get a emo kid out of a tree? cut him down get it: because he was depressed and so poor that he couldn't afford a hair cut or new clothes. he also had single mother whose boyfriend sexually abused him so he was confused about his sexuality. Then people just called him "emo" and said he was acting out so they ignored him and he never gave him help when he asked for it because they said he just wanted attention so he killed himself

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

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Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

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What does the black guy say to his black friend? "I like Watermelon, Grape Drink, and Fried Chicken.

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Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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Emma Brown..I'd tap that shit Dylan xoxo

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what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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