Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

When life gives you lemons, make a lemon and tamarind chutney.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

why do black people hate aspirin? Its white, it works, and you have to pick cotton to get to it.

How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

Whats worse than finding one worm in your apple? Two worms.

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

do you know what's so funny? yup

What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

What animal is green and eats a green rockeater? A green green rockeater eater. What animal is green and eats a green green rockeater eater? A frog.

Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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