Chuck Norris

Three guys walk into a club, one is a fat ugly chode face bastard, the second one is a 4 foot 2 cricket champion and the third is a handsome young man.

Situation: A bear is cutting a sunflower's hair Question: How many kangaroos does it take to do surgery on a meatball? Answer: Tomato. Because zebras eat twelve kiwis in a factory every February 29th.

What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

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Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

What is Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin'

milly, milly, milly, cat

Roses are red Violets are blue If I see another Joke like this (besides mine) I'll kill you

What did Helen Keller get at the store? Glasses

if quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? testicle

how do you get a emo kid out of a tree? cut him down get it: because he was depressed and so poor that he couldn't afford a hair cut or new clothes. he also had single mother whose boyfriend sexually abused him so he was confused about his sexuality. Then people just called him "emo" and said he was acting out so they ignored him and he never gave him help when he asked for it because they said he just wanted attention so he killed himself

Dan O'Driscoll

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

Whats the difference between a cobra and the hulk? One is my penis and the other one is a cobra.

Religion

What does the black guy say to his black friend? "I like Watermelon, Grape Drink, and Fried Chicken.

yo momma is so tall shes tall

knock knock Come in.

What does Obama and Darth Vader Have in Common? Nothing. Darth Vader is not a real person and thus cannot be compared to the president of the UNited States.

Water, please.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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