obama is a good president

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

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The real Justin Beiber reallly followed me on twitter I deleted my account, set my computer on fire, scattered the ashes and killed myself

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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Me: do u you want to here a joke You: ya Me: Woman's rights

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No.

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Potato potato potato potato potato? Potato potato potato.

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Q:Waht did the blind deaf kid get for chrismas? A: Cancer

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and the cut his head off

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Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

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So a man rapes a little girl but rips her eyes out before he does it. In court he said the appropriate thing about this was that she could not see it cuming.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

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noodles

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What did the homeless guy do when he saw a bucket? He peed in it

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Why couldn't the prostitute count to 70? She grew up in a poor family and couldn't pay for a good education.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

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How many times does it take a blond to start a car? Usually once; however, the weather may have an impact how well the engine will spark.

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What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

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haiku's are stupid, and do not always make sense, refrigerator.

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Q: Why did the paraplegic go to the gym? A: to watch his friend work out

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Thumbs this up

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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