What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. It's funny because the robot has no arms.

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Freddie Mercurys teeth

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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An asian walks out of math class

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society.

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a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

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Why did the Catholic priest get excommunicated from the church? He couldn't read.

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-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

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What do you call cheese thats not yours? Somebody elses cheese

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

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*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

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How many black guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None can, since noone can work together because they cant see eachother.

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What did batman say to the Joker? I'm Batman

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American Idol

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A seal walks into a club.

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What do a grape and a reindeer have in common? They're both purple, except the reindeer.

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Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

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two fish are in a tank.

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What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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The glass is half an hour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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