Two muffins are in an oven. The first muffin says, "Boy it's hot in here." The second says, "It sure is." Both muffins then faint from heat exhaustion and are eaten to death when taken out of the oven And thus tragically, the world would never know of the spectacular talking muffins.

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

Why was the ginger walking around in bare feet? He had no sole.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

Knock Knock Come in!

anus soup

Women's rights.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

Lacrosse

What is white on the top and black on the bottom? Society

Why did the horse fall over? Because I shot it

What's the difference between a Elephant? It can neither bike...

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

You want to know how I know you're gay You want to have sex with a person of the same sex

A man falls into a lake but no one is around to help him, luckily the man can swim so he got out of the lake and went home feeling embarrassed

Do you ever feel, like a plastic bag? No, because plastic bags are man-made inanimate objects.

Wanna hear a funny joke? Women's rights.

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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