the chicken whent boomand then died

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Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

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How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I talk to myself, and so do it I.

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A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

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There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

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What do you call a woman who has one leg that's shorter than the other? Asymmetrical.

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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Why were the sea hawks fans mad at the Super Bowl? Because why would you throw the ball if you have one yard to go

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Whats worse than HIV? AIDS

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

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How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

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What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops