What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman.

A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

How many pumpkins can you fit in a watch? Depends how much jelly is in the pumpkins

the chicken whent boomand then died

Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

Once you go black you may be more open to dating a second black person.

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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