name-Sally-Sue What I am good at in school: readin' annnd...math. What I need to work on in school: spelin

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

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Gadaffi

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Dozer has a soul

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The real Justin Beiber reallly followed me on twitter I deleted my account, set my computer on fire, scattered the ashes and killed myself

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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i had a bowl of soup and it was 5 inches in diameter and 3 inches tall. how much soup did i eat? very little because i drank most of it

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What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

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did you know Helen Keller had a dog? neither did she.

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Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch? Names

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Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

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How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

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What is the diffrence between a strait guy and a gay guy? The strait guy gets into heaven.

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What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

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Working hard or hardly working????

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What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

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When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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Why did the gorilla leave the zoo? He didn't, he was released.

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Rape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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