What did the blind, deaf rabbit get for Easter? . . . Eaten by a by a lion.

Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

"I have some pretty bad news for you, but to ease into it, I will try to work it into a conversation." -Alright Doctor, let's try that." "Hey, how are you feeling today?" -"I feel great!" "That's odd, because you have leukemia..."

Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

A mute says to a paraplegic: You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

What did batman say to robin befor they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

the chicken whent boomand then died

hi

A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

What did the bubble do to the wall? Nothing it is a Bubble.

Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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