How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

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What do you call a deaf person whom is behind the wheel of a car about to run off a cliff? ....

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look left now look right. washing machine

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

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how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: Nothing Really

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A man walks in a bar. He walks out.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh.

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Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

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KEVIN HART

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Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

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how do you know that harry potter isnt real a ginger has two freinds

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why was six afraid of seven? cause seven raped and pillaged eight's family.

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What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

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How do you stop a skunk from smelling? Block its nose.

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what's long, skin colored, erect, and limp? a finger.

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why is 5 afraid of 6? it isnt

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Don't rape me!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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