When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

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come along children

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What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

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What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

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Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

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holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

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what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

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What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

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Knock knock Who's there? What.

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Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

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your momma is so stupid she failed math class

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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womens rights!

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

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A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

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Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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