What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

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A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

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Why does the cool aid man make it look so easy to break through? -To Get to The Other Side!!!!!!

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Mmmmmmm Lemons

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Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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oops

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What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

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What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

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Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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Knock knock Violets are blue Helen Keller The Holocaust.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the light was green

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What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

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what is green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? You shouldn't eat Jews, unless your a cannibal for which you should seek psychological help.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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Hollywood presents: "HELP US MARIO! THE WORLD IS BEING OVERWHELMED BY KOOPA AND HIS FORCES OF TURTLES!" "What the hell do you want me to do? I am a damn plumber, squish them? Besides they are just turtles" "Oh yeah..." Steven Spielberg: Get bay on this script, at least its much better than the first one.

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What did the rape victim say to the rapist? "mmfff...mmm.....mmmmm"

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an invisible man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. No one noticed him cause hes invisible

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How many jews can you get in a car? 5, if you don't want any cops after you. The answer can also be 2,6,7,8,9. It's from car to car.

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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