a muslim walks in to a bar... there were no survivors

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What does a tree do all day? Boredom

thumb_up thumb_down -14

The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what do you call a jewish ladies boob? a joob

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the say to the host of the pool party after he pooped? Mr. TImmons! There is chocolate in the pool!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

thumb_up thumb_down -20

clown penis dot fart? dangle pussy

thumb_up thumb_down -22

wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Canada's army

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Water, please.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7,8,9! (Also it killed his family and nuked his country too)

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the guy kill his friends? He didn't, he doesn't have any friends

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Monica Lebinsky, your neighhbor"

thumb_up thumb_down -34

jacobs 1inch gets matt. t in 4 seconds

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A hot girl walks by a boy and he stares at her as she walks past. She see's him and asks "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied "Oh I'm sorry. You happened to look familiar and I thought 'Perhaps I've met this person before. School? No. Work? No. I then concluded I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at".

thumb_up thumb_down -42

The man who ran behind the bus got exhausted. The man who ran in front of the bus got tired. The first one survived.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

thumb_up thumb_down -94

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't because it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -122

What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops