roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch? Names

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How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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Why did Tommy get a wedgie? He was gay, and his parens were dead, so the school bully,decided to wedge his underwear up his butt.

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A Jew, a Muslim and an atheist meet at the same bus station. A religious argument breaks out shortly and the three board their respective buses angry and upset. They were a really bad example of religious tolerance.

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When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after A-N-A-L

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8===========D O:

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Yo Mama is so ugly she wears a mask on halloween

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What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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What do yo call SQUIRAL!!!!

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What's worse than being punched in the face? Being lynched.

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What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

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What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? They have the same middle name.

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Why did the teacher give out homework? she is a teacher

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

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A man is walking down the street when a woman asks "excuse me, have you got the time?" to which the man replies "Yes..yes i do" the woman thanks him, and continues with her time constricted shannigans.

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Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

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A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from sky-scraper Q:he dies

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Roses are green Violets are green I'm colour blind Everything is green

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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