What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. It's the middle of winter. Flowers look like poop.

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How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

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A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

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You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

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go go gadget

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

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Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

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your momma is so stupid she failed math class

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What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

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Knock knock Who's there? What.

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How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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Women's Basketball.

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how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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