How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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come along children

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69

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That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

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Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

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Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

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Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

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Hey, your mom left something at my house. It is pink and lasy. It is her new hat and i think she will want it back.

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there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

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What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

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What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

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Your mom is so dumb that she failed to pass her 11th grade year, forcing her to drop out to get a GED and spend the rest of her life at a dead end job

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I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

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What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

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A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

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What did Gene give Carla for Christmas? AIDS

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what did Johnny get for Halloween. ebola

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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Black people are clen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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