i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

come along children

What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

Which of the following is NOT true? A. The lemon is walking to a store. B. The store is walking to a lemon. C. The man is a lemon and a store. D. Peanuts are stuck in my anus

holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

Why did somebody text "lol"? Because they laughed out loud.

Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

How can you tell that a blonde has been using a computer? You can't. There's no common link between computing habits and hair color.

womens rights!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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