What did the fat man get for his birthday? diabetes

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Why does Helen Keller only masturbate with one hand? Because she's moaning with the other.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

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Why did the Nigger fuck shit? He was a shit fucking Nigger.

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Why was the man named Thomas? Because that was his name

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Why did Tyrone attack? Because he was getting made fun of

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your moms so fat when she sat on your ipod it turned into an ipad

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Whats the difference between a cobra and the hulk? One is my penis and the other one is a cobra.

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A semi-coherent black man was wandering down the street toward an open garbage receptacle. Immediately an angry, filthy raccoon jumped up, hissing and baring its fangs, as if to defend its territory against the startled negro. This happened four times in a row. Each time it was either a negro, a mexican, a crippled kid or a person of jewish ancestry. Each time the raccoon hissed viciously. Coincidence? No. The raccoon was obviously very hungry and attempting to defend its last remaining refuge of territory from the ever-increasing encroachment of man's filth into the formerly natural and pristine spaces where wildlife once lived. He is now reduced to hissing at the ethnics and the cripples, just to eek out a pitiful subsistence on trash.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravity

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what do you call a dear with no I? No I dear

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wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

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Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

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When did the black man go to the pharmacy and why ? His wife , for whom he cared very much , had a cold and he had to get her prescription for her . On top of that , he had a horrible problem problem with painkillers that caused him to have an aneurysm on the way there .

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why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

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How do you fit 100 charizards into a bus? Put them into pokeballs. Otherwise, there would be no possible way because Charizards are such large creatures.

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a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

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Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

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Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

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What's the difference between a bunch of slaves and a porsche? A: i don't have porsche in my basement

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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