why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

How can you tell that a blonde has been using a computer? You can't. There's no common link between computing habits and hair color.

your momma is so stupid she failed math class

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

Ask me if I'm a Banana Are you a Banana? Yes Oh, I couldn't tell in this lighting

Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

W.N.B.A.

What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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