Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

There is a car full of black people.

roses are red violets are blue kiss my ass you god damb goe..

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised how far a can can preach in Chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he entered with a swine, and the muslim is embarrased for the horse.

you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

What's your name? You tell me.

Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

your momma is so stupid she failed math class

Why did the thief steal the kitchen sink? Everything else was stolen by another thief earlier in the day.

What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...