Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

The glass is half an hour.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Is you refrigerator running? That's odd you should call the cops about that one!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What`s 3 times as worse than a war? 3 wars

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar. He drinks then comes home to his whole family murderd and mutilated

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

thumb_up thumb_down

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

thumb_up thumb_down

What the diffrence between a jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Three blind men walk into a bar but they were unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from them would be exploitative.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats worse than ten babies in one bin? One baby in ten bins.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Justin Bieber paid a donation to the anti-homosexual orginization.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What time is it? 12:03 AM

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats Funnier than 24?........ 25

thumb_up thumb_down -4

one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than a bee sting? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops