I can't think of a joke!

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What do you call a kid with no arms annd legs? Names

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So dont touch it

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Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

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No

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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Anal cheese curds.

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A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

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How do you know if a monster is hiding under your bed or in your closet? Go and look.

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Knock knock who's there? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dislike me!

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Bumsniffer

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? punch her in the dick.

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Whats 0+0 0

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What does a mexican do when he gets lost in the woods? He does his best to find food, shelter, and water until a search and rescue operation finds him.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

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There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

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Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

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Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

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As a wise man once told me... "natives."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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