Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

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What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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What happened to the man who was hit by a car? He was immediately rushed to a hospital and was reported to have a broken femur dislocated shoulder and several broken ribs. The driver was later found and was declared driving under the influence of alcoholic beverages and the victim's family sued the driver for the medical costs. The driver was arrested and was sent to a detention center for 3 months and the victim made a complete recovery.

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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roses are red violets are red everything's red i'm colour blind

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A horse walks into a bar...n

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A Nazi ran into a Bar.

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Why don't rhetorical questions need answers? Because that is what makes them rhetorical.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Whats worse than your camera not working? getting hit by a fridge during the Holocaust

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did you know Helen Keller had a dog? neither did she.

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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What do your friends and a tree have in common? They both die if you set them on fire.

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so there i must be a pig

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Whats worse than living with cancer? Dieing of cancer.

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your face.

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What do you call it when a drunk guy puts a tree in his house and then decorates his fireplace with his socks? Christmas (I didn't come up with this)

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A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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Why is he called Donald Trump? Because he trumps a lot...

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Nicholas Cage

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A mexican goes to an ATM.

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What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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