Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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W.N.B.A.

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What is worse then Hitler? Shelly's Cooking.

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Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

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What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

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What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

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What did Jimmy get for his birthday? Nothing, he was dead

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Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

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What is 69? A two digit number.

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One night you tell your mom to make you a sandwich, the next day in school you ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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A bear walks into a bar and says to the barman "I'll have a pint of................ beer please." The barman says "why the big pause?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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