Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

What do you call a mexican without a lawn mower? .....unemployed

Why does the cool aid man make it look so easy to break through? -To Get to The Other Side!!!!!!

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Your mama's so fat, that during her last physical checkup, her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to lose some weight before any serious medical conditions arose that would adversely affect her health and well being in a chronic fashion.

Q: what do strawberry and a cat have in common? A: they are both red except for the cat

What do you call Obama? - the president

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

why did the koala fall out of the tree it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree it was fit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree it was inside the fridge why did the 6th koala fall out of the tree it was punished for dropping a fridge why did the 7th koala fall out of the tree it committed suicide after framing the 6th koala

What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

whats more serious than rape... the holocaust

Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

Why did the dog go in the bar? Because the door was left open

You play the piano? What more can you do? Sounds complicated but try me.

why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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