Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

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The man who ran behind the bus got exhausted. The man who ran in front of the bus got tired. The first one survived.

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What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

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Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did polly fall of her swing ??? She had no arms

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two philosophers stood in silence at the foot of a very large mountain; a mountain not only too high to climb, but also too wide to walk around. So the first philosopher finally speaks: "...so, what do you do for a living?"

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Why are black guys so tall? Because their knee grows

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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My sister has to take a dump

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"I have some pretty bad news for you, but to ease into it, I will try to work it into a conversation." -Alright Doctor, let's try that." "Hey, how are you feeling today?" -"I feel great!" "That's odd, because you have leukemia..."

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

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What do you get when you cross an African-American, a bird, and ice cream? I don't know.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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your mother's head is so big that she wears very big hats.

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Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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Adam Sandler.

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how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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