Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winning it twice.

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Have you ever seen the mexican that went to college? Yes, the DREAM act increased the number of minorities in public universities

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What did the black man say to the latino man? Nothing he was far to busy trying to get a cab to his office meeting for his board of directors do not appreciate tardiness

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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Simon Cowell's hair is real.

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

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What's the difference between a black man with a pie and an asian with an apple. They're of different ethnicitiesand cultures, and are holding different foods.

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Why did johnny fall down? He got hit in the head with a brick

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roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

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What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's just been shot, despite the fact that zebra hunting is illegal.

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whats more serious than rape... the holocaust

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Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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Tacos

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3 men- Greg-Allen-And James were on their way back from the bar. When the driver, Greg spun out of control. All of them died Instantly. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told them. " The better you were with Relationships, And loving just one person. The better Transportation you got." He bagan handing things out. " Well, Greg. Looks like you cheated on your most recent Girlfriend... Twice. You get a Bike." Next was Allen " Allen! Shame on you! You have dated 4 women at once! You get a Scooter!" And last was James. " James! You have stayed true to your wife! And all of your other ex- girlfriends. You get a Mustang!" Allen and Greg seen james, Sitting on his car, Upset. "Man! Whats wrong? You have the best thing you could get! I'd be happy!" James looks up and says " Thanks guys, But I just seen my Wife on A skateboard.."

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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