What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

*Look Down* Nice shoes, wanna F@#k?

What's red and green? A frog in a blender

What happened when the boy didn't forward the chain message to ten people. Nothing.

"And i look to myself what the hell happened to our world..."

whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

When life gives you Lebanon, make lebanonanade.

three men walked into a bar, can't believe know one noticed it.

What is brown and smells? Poop

What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so there i must be a pig

you are gay

yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

noodles

"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

25

What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

If i was a chicken i would probably not be on this site. But i am, so you can all suck it!!!! BAHHHH i'm a frog EJ

your moms so fat when she sat on your ipod it turned into an ipad

What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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