What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

A blonde's house is on fire so she calls the fire department and they ask her how to get there. She gives them the address, but they hear her wrong and she dies a horrible fiery death.

two boys break out in a verbal fight. the first boy says your so stupid youd sell a cow for a gallon of milk. the second boy replied, i agree with you 110%.

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun. What did Santa get for the young boys sister? Nothing, the boy shot Santa. Who sent out presents the next Christmas? Not Santa.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

your momma is so stupid she failed math class

What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas, for Christmas is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ, celebrated generally on December as a religious and cultural holiday by billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide. Christmas is a civil holiday in many of the world's nations, is celebrated by an increasing number of people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

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What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

What did the man say to his wife before they went to bed? Goodnight.

A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Actually a lot because a pizza is a pizza andna Jew is a human.

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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